Walang Forever

Chapter 36

«Ranielle»

I have never seen Drake this way. He's sleeping peacefully; no worries. Akala mo batang walang prino-problema sa buhay.

Well, I'm actually inside his bedroom. I know it sounds wrong but I really have to talk to him. I mean right now.

"Hoy." I slapped his right cheek pero di naman masyadong malakas. Sakto lang.

"Aray!" He exclaimed as he opened his eyes.

"Bae?" He rubs his sleepy eyes with his hands.

We were both laying down on his bed—staring at one another.

I smiled at him.

"Anong ginagawa mo dito?" His face is close to mine but I don't mind it anymore. It's just... he need to know what I really feel for him. It's hard but he deserves to know it. Like how Gene make things clear. I HAVE TO MAKE THINGS CLEAR TOO.

"Diba hinahanap ka ng mama mo?" He ask.

I nodded. 

"I have to talk to you first."

"Ranielle, your mom is more important than me. Umuwi ka na." He said sincerely.

I pulled out my cellphone and dialed mom's number.

"Anong ginagawa mo?" Drake glances at the screen of my phone. His forehead touches my left cheek which made my heart beats faster. But I pushed him away with my hands.

"Sungit." He mummbled.

"Hello ma? Nandito ako sa bahay ni Drake. Magpapaalam lang ako sakanya. I'll be home for dinner. Sorry... sige, Iove you." I ended the call and turn my head to Drake to continue our conversation.

"Magpapaalam?" He laid flat on his back, staring at the ceiling.

"Did you know..." I started. Drake didn't look at me he continued to stare at the ceiling.

"...Gene and I are okay now." 
He didn't give me any response. He's just silent.

"Naaalala mo yung prize na hinihingi mo?" I nudged his shoulder with my elbow.

I wanted to break down this thick wall of awkwardness between us. Why is it here in the first place anyway?

"Uhuh." He responded atlast.

"Yung D.Q. ba?" He added.

I shook my head. "Yung isa. Yung: Forget this Gene and notice me." 

He looked at me red-faced.

I let out a light chuckle.

He smiled at me. "Naaalala mo pa yun?"

"Yup, and I am planning to give you that prize."

He stared at me—stunned. Like he heard something that he's been waiting for a long time.

"Ranielle..." He whispered.

I gave him a crook smile.

I have decided to accept Drake. I do like Gene but it's too late to start something now. Sa totoo lang, I wouldn't mind kung ano man yung mga bagay na naging dahilan ng paglayo nya sakin kung sinabi nya agad. But right now, it's too late for both of us. I did love him but it's over. I was scared nung time na nakipagkita ako kay Gene kasi pakiramdam ko if we talk, baka kasi lahat ng nararamdaman ko sakanya dati ay bumalik. But at that moment I wanted to know if he's still eager for me. Nararamdaman ko kasi that there is something that's pulling him away from me and when he started to run back to me it's too late. Like he said, there's no portal back to my world. If you choose to leave, you will never find that portal again. Like Alice in Wonderland. Drake has given me a new world, far better than what Gene had given me. When Gene hugged me yesterday on the park, I cried because Gene's warmth isn't what I wanted to feel anymore. I cried because it's Drake that I wanted, tapos kung anong masasakit na bagay pa yung sinabi ko sakanya bago kami maghiwalay sa D.Q. I realized everything he has done for me: he comforted me nung panahong nag quit sa work si Gene. He helped me nung naaksidente ako at nagkasakit, sya lang ang taong bumisita sakin at nagdala pa sya ng paborito kong mais. He made me feel strong nung nakita ko si Gene sa restaurant kasama yung anak nya. He made me feel special, he never got tired of fetching me before and after school. Minsan alam kong 3 hours pa bago ang uwian ko pero inaantay pa rin nya ko. It's Drake that I needed and he deserve to have the love he has given to me. This is the love he deserves.

Drake stroke his hands through my hair and slowly, he press his lips against my forehead. He hugged me and I can feel his heartbeat and it made me feel alive. I would want to stay like this, this is the warmth I have always wanted.

I rested my head on his arm.

"I will be back Drake. Four years lang akong mawawala. It will not take me forever." I said.

"Akala ko ba hindi ka naniniwala sa forever?" He retorted.

"Walang forever, kung hindi ako maniniwalang meron."

"So you mean, naniniwala kana sa forever?" 

"As long as you believe in it, there is." I answered.

He place his hand over my forehead.
"May lagnat ka ba Ranielle? Anong nangyayari sayo?"

I laughed "I just heard it from someone."

I guess Gene won the first prize for my poll. Credits to him.

If Drake and I would choose to love each other forever, then there is forever. It depends on us. It's just a matter of decisions. Hindi mahalaga ang opinyon ng ibang tao ang mahalaga ay kung ano ang pinaniniwalaan mo. Human mind is so powerful, it can create or destroy something in a few seconds and right now, I choose to create. To create something they called "FOREVER."

"Drake." I uttered.

He tilted his head and looks at me over his shoulder.

I flushed my cheeks at him.

"I LOVE YOU FOREVER."