How to Help Howell?

Part 4

Phil

I'm starting to get a little worried about Dan. When he arrived back to the flat the night before, he looked exhausted. The next morning I woke up to a note on the refrigerator saying he'd gone out for yet another run and would see me when he got back.

It was starting to get really lonely without Dan there. I guess it's good that Dan found a hobby, but, to be fair, Dan had never really been interested in sports, so I never had to worry about that before. Now I'm all alone with no one to hang out with, or simply just talk to. That's what I needed, I needed someone to talk to.

And now I had to worry about Dan getting hurt too! What if he tripped on an uneven bit of pavement and took a hard fall? I wouldn't be able to handle the stress of Dan being in the hospital.

I decided that I was being too paranoid and needy, so to put my mind off things, I made myself some breakfast and sat down to a Buffy marathon that appeared on the television.

Dan

I had jogged about the same bit that I had yesterday, feeling winded and out of shape. I decided it would be best to just walk back to the flat. On the way back I met a young girl who recognized me.

"Danisnotonfire?" She asked, shocked.

"Yeah, that's me," I responded weakly, trying to calm my breathing so I didn't look like a panting idiot while meeting a fan.

"I like your videos," she looked at me, her smile slowly disappearing and turning into a confused look.

"You're a lot larger in real life than I thought you were. I mean, I knew you were tall, but...hmm...large..." She trailed off.

"Anyway," she chimed back in with a full on smile as if nothing had happened, while my intestines were too busy imploding.

"Could I get a picture?" She asked innocently. I nodded slightly and looked into the camera with the best resemblance of a smile I could make at the moment.

"Well, it was nice to meet you!" She called as she walked away. I stumbled back into the building and up to the flat. I struggled to get the key into the door with my shaking hands and tears blurring my vision.

I was sobbing by the time I finally got into the flat and ran into my bedroom. This, unfortunately, attracted the attention of Phil, watching  TV without a care in the world. He rushed to my bedroom door and knocked on it gently.

"Dan, could I come in please?" He asked quietly and politely. I hadn't bothered to lock the door, so he opened the door cautiously and peeked his head in to find me curled up in a ball on my bed shaking violently while crying hysterically.

"Oh, Dan!" He rushed over to me, lying next to me and putting his arms around my crumpled form.

"What happened, love?" He asked gently. I was taken aback by the new nickname, but still couldn't stop crying. Phil gave a small grunt of frustration.

"I didn't mean to say that, I'm sorry," while I was surprised by the name, it wasn't necessarily unpleasant. I crawled up so my head was leaning against Phil's chest and just cried into his t shirt for a while. Phil was very understanding, rubbing my back and telling me it's ok.

Once I had calmed down he asked, "Now, what is it? Did you trip and fall on some uneven pavement?" I released a small chuckle.

"No, I...met a fan..." Another tear rolled down my cheek and I looked up at Phil.

He wiped it away and continued, "Fans are nice, right?"

"But she...oh, I was right, Phil, I knew it and this proves my fans know it too." I tried to get out what she said to me but just managed to make more tears fall from my seemingly un-drainable eyes.

I was finally able to get out, "She called me large, Phil. And not large like tall, she even specified for me," my shoulders started to shake again as I continued to cry.

Phil rocked me back and forth, playing with my hair and rubbing circles in my back.

"Dan, you know that's not true, right?" He asked me, so oblivious to the truth.

"We're best friends, Phil. You don't need to lie to me." I explained. Something inside me got slightly disappointed when I said "best friends" and not something else.

"I'm not lying! You really are perfectly fine in every way, Dan. And I mean it."

Phil

I looked down into his now puffy and ever so deep chocolate eyes. And for a moment, I thought I saw a glimmer of hope. But it then disappeared and he gave an empty, "Thanks,"

"Dan, why don't you believe me?"

"How can I when the truth is staring me in the face and constantly nagging at the back of my brain?" He countered.

"Oh, Dan," I sighed, rocking him back and forth once more, sinking deeper into our whatever position this was. Maybe "tangled, sweaty, tear-stained, emotional pile of humans" was a good name for it.

"You're perfect. And it really hurts that you can't see that for yourself." I whispered into his ear. I stopped rocking and just hugged him real tight. He once again looked up at me with hurt in his eyes. I gave him a reassuring smile and he put his head back down on my chest. I rested my head on his and we eventually fell asleep that way.