How to Help Howell?

Part 26

Dan's POV

I don't dare turn around because I might rethink what I'm about to do. I just stop leaning forward, stand there, and listen.

"Dan?" A low voice asks, but breaks when it tries to voice my name.

"Dan...what are you doing? Please step down from there, please." They plead.

I turn my head to the side so I'm able to get a glimpse at the one who is trying to save me.

Tears well up in the figure's deep blue eyes and the wind from the top of the building blows gently through his elegant black fringe.

I look back at the skyline in front of me and take a step closer to it, my toes now hanging off the edge of the roof. I hear a scream so high pitched that it made an adorable squeak behind me.

"Dan, no, you can't do this, please, Dan, please," he sobs.

"Phil, it's ok." I reply calmly. "I'll be gone soon and everything will be so much better, you'll see." I try to reassure him. This just makes him cry even harder and he just looks at me with hurt in his big, puppy dog eyes.

"You can't do this," he repeats. "You can't leave me, I don't know what I'd do without you, Dan, you just can't!" He screamed, completely losing it.

I nudge my feet farther away from the building so that only my heels are keeping me from falling to my overdue death. I outstretch my arms like wings. Maybe I'll be able to fly soon! I remove my left foot from the edge and balance it in front of me, beginning to take the last step I'll ever take.

This seems to spark Phil's realization that he can move. He runs forward and wraps his arms around my torso, careful not to shove me off the building. He picks me up gently and moves me a couple feet away from the edge of the building. My plan is ruined.

I look at the sky longingly. "No," I whimper under my breath. I relax my body completely, to show Phil that I was calming down. Feeling my adrenaline rising, I suddenly attempt to break free of Phil's grasp and run to my freedom off the building roof.

However, Phil's quick reflexes make his arms tighten around me. He uses all of his strength to contain me and my will to stop living. After a couple minutes of struggling, my once burning candle of hope slowly gets snuffed out. I look out to the horizon, seeing what I have missed out on, for Phil is obviously not going to let me go.

I collapse onto the floor and finally let out all of my emotions that I have been holding in for so long. I cry louder and with more force than I have in a very long time.

Phil just holds me and rubs my back as I slowly accept that he's not going to let me go.

Suddenly, Phil grabs me by the shoulders and makes me look at him face to face. He wipes the tears slowly slipping down my face and a few that he let slip out as well.

"Dan, you need to understand that suicide isn't the better option. I care about you way too much. If you jumped off that building just then, I would have to jump after you. You're the light of my life, Dan, you're my everything and-" he sniffles and wipes away another stray tear.

"And Dan Howell, I love you with all my heart. So much that it would probably break if you ever did that to yourself. I need you so much more than you realize, Dan. I love you so, so much." He pulls me into a hug and I feel his shoulders shake as he cries silently into my shoulder.

After a few minutes, Phil stops crying and I ask, "Can we go home? I'm kinda tired,"

Phil nods and stands up, extending his arm down to help me up. I take his hand and don't let go of it as we walk out of the building together, feeling more connected to each other than ever before.