My Best Friend Jimmy

Tents and Booze

"Oh... my... god..." we both gasped as our mouths slowly fell open. All the kids I went to school with, their friends, and their friends and their mother's friends were there. The small get together that I had been told about turned out to be a monsterous high school rager... which I never attended when I was in high school.

We got out of the car and just stood there next to each other as we just stared at the crowd of people. Jimmy, with his hands on his hips, looked over to me and said from the side of his mouth, "Does anyone know that we're coming? Are people going to be all over us? We are TV royalty..." He and I were thinking the exact same thing.

"I didn't know this many people were going to be here. I thought it was just going to people that already knew me when I was on TV."

No later than 5 seconds after I said that, Tom and Jamie fought through the crowd with beers in hand. Jamie ran over to me and gave me a long time coming hug and Tom came in and messed up my hair because he was just a shit like that.

"Tom, we are 27 years old. I may not have this hair for much longer!"

Everyone had a good laugh and I introduced Jimmy to everyone.

"And as you could probably conclude, this is Jimmy Fallon."

Jamie said in her usual sarcastic tone which was one of the many things I loved about her, "Yeah I kind of assumed considering you guys were two of the biggest names in SNL history."

Jimmy butted in and said, "Yeah but I'm definitely number one right?"

Everyone laughed and I knew he'd fit in just fine here.

Jamie and Tom informed us that they talked to everyone before and kind of told everyone to just treat us like normal human beings and just be cool around us. We really appreciated that. Living in New York City and having to fight our way through flashing cameras that were just waiting for us to get involved in a scandal was part of our daily routine. It was nice to just have fun and not having to worry about being perfect for the camera.

"Let's get you guys some burgers and beers!" Tom said from over his shoulder to Jimmy and I as we walked to the party.

Jimmy said rubbing his tummy, "Ahhh the two B's I live by." He looked at me and nudged me in the ribs with his elbow. 

Just to him, I said, "And butts. You're a butt guy."

"I do like me some booty."

After we got some food in us and caught up with some of my old friends from high school, it was time to set up the tent. By this time, I had only had a couple of Mike's Hards and was perfectly fine. Jimmy, on the other hand, had a couple of shots and beers and was feeling good. We somehow managed to get the tent out of the car and brought in over to the spot where we were going to set it up.

We got the tent all layed out and all we had to do was raise it now. As I said before, Jimmy was feeling pretty good. He was hilarious. He was laughing a little too hard and went to pick up one of the poles to raise the tent and it slipped and pinched his middle finger right by the knuckle. Immediately, I could see a rush of blood coming from his hand.

"Fuck!"

Running over from the other side of the tent to him, I said in my usual sarcastic tone, "God dammit Jimmy! You're getting blood all over the damn tent. Come on, its not that bad. Let's go get that shit cleaned up."

He laughed and said, "I was going on 2 weeks without fucking up one of my fingers. What the hell is happening to me hahaha!"

"You better have good health insurance because by the time you're 30, you're going to have nubs for hands."

He then proceeded to chase me all the way to my car with his bloody hand. I got the first aid kit out of my trunk and got out the alcohol pads.

"Do we really have to do this?" He said wincing as I held the pad to his finger.

"Nah we don't. You can just get gangrene or something and that'll be the end."

"Yeah I'll take the alcohol pad. Only because it has alcohol on it."

"You would say that."

"The heart wants what the heart wants."

"Okay hold still. I'm going to wrap it up now."

I could feel him looking at me and watching me. I pretended that I didn't notice and just kept wrapping his hand. I flipped his hand over and brought it up to his face so I could wrap the other side. Our eyes met and he said, "I still haven't heard anything from Nancy."

I flipped his hand back over and broke eye contact with him.

"I'm starting to get worried about her. About us. What if she doesn't want to be with me anymore? What if she's met another ma--"

"All fixed!" I cut him off.

Rubbing his wrist with his other hand, "Thanks."

Rubbing the back of neck which was my tell that I knew something and wasn't going to say it, I hesitantly said, "Well maybe you should give her a call tonight. I think she's working right now, but maybe you guys could talk about some things."

"Yeah I think that's a good idea. I'm nervous though. What if it doesn't go well?"

"Well you're not going to know until you talk to her about things."

"You're right. It's probably nothing. She's probably just swamped with work."

"Oh yeah probably. Yeah just give her a call tonight. It'll take care of all the wondering you're doing."

"Yeah it will. Hey, all this bleeding and shit made me hungry. Lets go grab some more food."

"Sounds like a plan."

I put the kit back in my trunk and shut it. Not telling him what was happening was truly eating me up inside. I didn't know how long I was going to be able to keep this from him. I couldn't tell him something that was going to hurt him like that. I couldn't.