Working Love

13

Ever since that dream, I can't look at Ethan straight in the eyes. All I can picture is him under me, screaming my name. I can picture all of the things that I would do to him, the way his body would feel beneath my touch. How soft his skin would be, how warm. How his voice would sound while I run my hands up and down his. "Bad Carter!" I bang my head on the table, and hear a soft laugh next to me. I look from the corner of my eye, and see Ethan looking at me. "Hey babe." That has become so normal for me to say now.

"Hi. Is there a reason why you banged your poor head on the table?" He lifted my head and placed a kiss on it. I love when he does stuff like that. He pulled back and I saw his smiling face, with that familiar shade of pink on his cheeks. The memories of me pressing his bare chest to the window, as I run my hand down his smooth skin. The way he looked at me with desire in his eyes, and his pink cheeks tinted from all the stimulation he was feeling. "Hello, earth to Carter! Tell the aliens I want my fiance back please!" I laughed at his silly joke, he really was like a little kid sometimes. But his child like innocents is what I love about him.

"Sorry, I spaced out." I gave him a smile so he knows I'm okay. One thing I learned from Ethan, is that I don't 'smile' enough. He says I have grins, smirks, but those aren't true smiles. He says when I smile, my face looks cuter. So now I only truly smile like this for him, because it makes him happy. I understand now why dad had that one rare smile only for mom. It's a small thing we can do to make them happy, like they make us each day.

"I love that smile." I took his hand and sat him on my lap. Even tough he had muscles, and the fact that he is a man meant nothing, he was so light, and he fit perfectly between my arms.

"And I love you." We were finally able to say it to one another. Whether it was truly love or not meant nothing, since we were both happy just to hear it. I kissed his cheek, making them turn their normal shade of pink. He really does blushes way too easily, but it's just one of the many things I find adorable about him. "Did you go tux shopping with your mom?"

"Yes. Since I'm a man it's easier to pick one for the wedding. She said that when she was searching for her dress, she went through thousands until she found the right one." I laughed with him, because I can definitely see her doing something like that. "What about you? Do you have yours?"

"Yeah. Me and James went at the same time. Since he is going to be my best man he had to get one too."

"Great. I'm going with Jenny today to find a dress for her. I hate calling her a bridesmaid, since I'm not a bride." This topic was a hard one for our parents to ask. Since we are both men, they didn't know what to call it. They figured I would be the groom, since they said I seemed more dominant than Ethan. I was pissed off when they said that, it caused him to walk out the room. None of us ever thought we would be planning a wedding for two males, so they had no idea what to do in certain situations. Let alone how to go about bringing up the topics. Situations like this were coming up every now and then.

"Ethan look at me." He turned to look at me, and he had this expression on his face that I have deemed as his 'business face'. His features become stoic, almost too serious for someone with his shy demeanor. He's gotten really good at wearing that type of expression since he's been working to take over some day, but I hate how it hides who he really is. I've seen it the few times he has tried to hide the fact that he is upset from me. "Do not give me that look, you know I don't like it." Now listen to me. I don't think of you as a woman, and never will. You are a proud Bisexual man, and I respect that. I know that if you would have married a woman you would not have been asked any of these question. Our parents just don't know how to go about asking some of this stuff. We're all learning. So here's what I'm thinking. We are both men, so we are obviously both grooms. James is my best man, so Jenny can be your best woman." He stared at me for a moment, before cupping my face between his hands and pulling me in for a kiss. He kissed me so deeply, I couldn't contain the moan that escaped my lips.

"Thank you Carter. To be honest, I was worried." I just hummed, letting him know to go on. "This whole time, I worried maybe you wanted me to act like a woman because, I thought that's what you wanted. I may like guys, but I also like woman. I don't want to be seen as one just because I am not as assertive as most people would expect me to be." I knew this was bothering him, I should have done something about it sooner. I pulled him closer to me, and took his hand in mine. I gave each of his knuckles a soft kiss.

"Ethan, I never once thought of you as a woman. You are the only one who's touch doesn't bother me." I couldn't hold in a small airy laughed when I saw the confusion in his face. "Every time I was done with those women, I would go home and scrub my skin raw. Their touches, made me feel dirty in a way. Like a part of me knew it was wrong, and I hated how I felt. When I met you, I thought you were so innocent and pure. When I started feeling something for you, even if I wasn't sure exactly what that feeling was, I knew I just wanted to push myself away so I wouldn't dirty you too. When you touch me, I feel so warm inside. That's something that I have not felt in a very long time. And now that I have, I never want to lose it. I never want to lose you Ethan." I stood up with him still in my arms. "In the short time that I have been with you, so much has changed. You managed to make me realize things about myself, you brought me and my father closer. We're already getting married, but I want to do this right." I dropped to one knee, with his hand still in mine. I saw his lips part, and his eyes shine with unshed tears. I could feel his hand shaking in mine. "Ethan Alexander Kingman, will you do me the honer of becoming my husband?"

"Yes." No hesitate, thank god. I don't think I would have been able to handle it if he did.

"Oh my goodness!" We turned and saw his parents and my father standing at the doorway. His mother seemed to be over the moon, and our dad's seemed really happy. "Oh, I think I'm going to cry." She was trying to fan her tears away with her hand. We all let out small laughs as we watched her.

"Mother." He pulled his crying mother into his arms. Seeing him hold her reminded me just how strong Ethan's body really is. His strong arms that have been trained to fight, but he refuses to ever use them. Ethan is truly a gentle soul through and through. And I can actually say he is mine.