Like I said my muse is finally near me again and I am finally able to think clearly and get my ideas out. Read, comment, vote! Because without you readers Id have no reson to write.
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Feeling like a vegetable about to be blanched I couldnt figure a way out so I told her everything from beginning to end and the first thing she said was, "But Sean isnt GAY!" Not wanting to say to much I told her that it didnt matter to me.
After that whole awkward conversation was over I went home and felt better then I had before I felt as though things werent going to be so bad even if he wasnt near me. So i texted him, more and more as the days moved forward and the pain began to ease until he said he was coming back to visit again. But this time something was different about it it was like I was gonna lose my mind if he didnt come back.
I tried not to let it get to me and as I talked to him I did my best to hold back a bit and not be so forth coming with everything I felt and had to say. I was getting closer to graduating some how, guess I was able to do my work on autopilot. I had almost enough money saved to get my own place so alot for me was jumbled and I couldnt really think cearly but I knew that I wanted him to be able to stay with me no questions asked on his next visit.
But like evryone says nothing you plan to make easy ever is. and like that I got hit with fines, parking dilemas, tuition, and of course bills. by the time everything was taken care of I had a week and a half before his visit and I had spent more than what I had save and had about half of my most recent check.
So I couldnt get my own place I couldnt get thing in order to make staying with me a better option then someone else but I could be close to him every minute he was here. So the plan was find where he is staying and be there but as all my plans never worked out niether did that one.
Im not even sure when he got back to town but I do know that he was gonna be staying with that girl Sarah. I still didnt care for her not that I ever knew her or much about her, I just didnt like her, call it jealousy if you want but it was deeper to me.
Once I got her address I race to go get him I wanted him in my arms as soon I could get to him. I got there but before I could get out to grab him he was already climbing in the car. So i didnt get my hug but who cares I had him.
We hung out the whole day and most of the night actually Im pretty sure I got so messed up that I gave him my car keys and asked him to take me home and he could bring me the car the next day. Partly because I knew he would take care of it as if it were his own. But mostly because I couldnt drive at all. and I only had about half a bottle of vodka.
When I got up the next morning I walked to the window and didnt see my car. I didnt freak out because 1 I had left it places before to avoid driving under the influence and 2 because I had yet to have a cup of coffee. After about the 3rd cup I remembered Sean was in town and he had my car so I was good. I texted him saying I was up and almost ready he said he was on his way so I had time to shower and decide on the right outfit.
Once I was dressed and ready to go I picked up my phone to call him and as I was typing his number the phone rang. Kinda creepy but I answer and he said he was getting off the exit and would be out side in 12 minutes so that gave me enough time to smoke and brush my teeth again before he showed up. Yeah he was born with asthma and I dont like doing it in front of him.
He got there as I was walking out of the bathroom and I jumped in the car and he said we were headed to Dave and Busters, which I may add is pretty damn far away. He said it was Micheal's birthday and he wanted to go, as much as I wanted to object I didnt I just said ok and started on our long drive.
