This is Gospel-- Tadashi x Reader(COMPLETE)

Chapter 16

~~~'Cause I won't give up without a fight~~~

Gray.

Everything was gray for you now.

You didn't go to class anymore. You barely left your room. Hell, you barely got out of bed.

Everything reminded you of him.

The trolleys that passed on the streets below your window made you close the curtains. Memories of early mornings and late nights spent in your room laughing until you cried kept you from looking at your computer. You hardly looked at your phone because you couldn't bring yourself to talk to your friends.

In the past month since Tadashi's death, you had left the house exactly twice.

The first was the morning after Tadashi died. You had woken up staring at the ceiling, disoriented from sleep. And then you remembered.

You cried your eyes out into your pillow, then got hurriedly dressed in an oversized T shirt and sweatpants, hardly remembering that you didn't take off your prosthetic the night before. You walked numbly out of the house and instead of jumping onto the trolley, you broke down again. Then, you walked back inside.

The second time was Tadashi's funeral. You didn't want to go, everything in you protested it. But you knew you had to; you weren't the only one suffering. So you got dolled up as you could, and as you looked at the drab black dress in the mirror, you couldn't stand yourself. You knew Tadashi hated when you tried to blend into the background. So you threw off the black dress and instead got out the one he bought for you months ago.

It was yellow, with a skirt to your knees and a white top. It flowed with you and had a halter cut top. You did your hair, but no makeup, which might not have been a good idea because of how much you had been crying and how little you had been sleeping.

The second you walked in the door of the Lucky Cat Café, Cass ran over to you and hugged you close and tight like a sister. "Thank you, (Y/N)," she whispered in your ear. You nodded numbly, then walked up the stairs.

You saw your friends grouped around the living area and they all rushed over to you.

"(Y/N), why didn't you return my calls? I was worried sick!" Honey Lemon asked.

"Yeah. We're here for you, you know?" Wasabi comforted. You nodded numbly again, and walked away. Finally, you saw Hiro on the staircase leading to Tadashi's room.

"Hey," Hiro greeted, not looking up from where he was staring at his hands.

"Hi," you responded. Hiro scooted over on the staircase, and you sat next to him.

There was a moment of heavy silence.

"I like your dress."

"Thanks. Tada--he bought it for me."

"You look great in it."

Silence.

"It's not fair," you heard Hiro whisper. You put your arm comfortingly around his shoulders.

"Life isn't fair," you responded, "because if it was, I would have two legs and a boy who loves me still alive."

"They keep saying that Tadashi's not really gone," Hiro said, balling his fists up, "as long as we remember him."

"But it still hurts," you replied, looking straight ahead.

Silence.

"I've been doing tests, you know."

"Yeah? On what?"

"Oh, right. I never told you, Hiro. I guess I only ever told Tadashi."

"What is it?"

"The day before the fire, I showed Tadashi my secret project. It was supposed to be a serum to regrow limbs. But it didn't work like I planned it to," you explained. "Remember the paper cut I had? It healed before it had proper time."

"Really?"

"And I didn't go to the hospital after the fire because the damage the shrapnel did to my stomach healed in five hours."

"So what you're saying is--"

"Maybe I could have saved him," you sobbed out, burying your face in your hands. "That's the worst part. Knowing there was a way I maybe could've saved him and I didn't."

Silence.

"Hey, (Y/N)?"

"Yeah, Hiro?"

"I need you to promise me something."

"What is it?"

"I need you to promise to go to Tadashi's lab and look through his papers. It's going to take a while, but there's something there I think you need to see."

"Okay. I promise."

Hiro's hands found yours and held them tightly, like your hands were his only tether to reality and vice versa.

At the funeral, yellow and white stood out against the black and gray.

As Tadashi's casket was lowered into the ground, the part of you that had been foolishly hoping Tadashi would show up out of nowhere was finally buried with him.

( •-• )

Bonus:

Gogo texted Honey Lemon.

Hey, I'm really worried about (Y/N).

Honey Lemon replied:

Yeah, she's not responding to my texts.

This whole thing sucks.

I just hope we don't end up losing two friends instead of just one.

Yeah.

Hey Gogo?

Yeah?

I miss him.

I miss him too.

Hey guys. I want to tell you that this is the second to last chapter of this book, and I really appreciate everyone who's read it up to this point. I'm glad you guys enjoy it and wow I'm feeling so depressed right now.

So I'll see you guys in the final chapter.

~Author-chan