drowning|shawn mendes

- happens -

"i realized that i was and am stupid. i-i still love you. i'm hoping you'd give me a second chance for me to make everything right and-" shawn sniffled.

"you want me to forgive you after what happened. that just doesn't happen to anyone. you can't just come into my life again expecting me to forgive and take you back." though she laid there knowing that's exactly what she wanted to do.

"that just doesn't happen to anyone."

"i'm shitty, stupid, but if you forgive me i promise you're the only girl. i just want my baby back, please." shawn couldn't contain his emotions. he really did want nina back and nina wanted him too, yet she couldn't risk getting her heart broken by the she loves again.

"i-i can't r-isk myself g-getting hurt anymore. especially by you. i think you should go." this was all a lie. she did not want shawn to leave, yet this would only make it harder for her.

things wouldn't be the same if she took him back or not. she wouldn't look at him the same way, think of him the same way, trust him the same way. she always had thoughts and memories drilled into her mind that couldn't be distinguished. she remembers every heartbreaking moment experienced.

her mother and little brother laying in a casket looking lifeless, her father being taken away for illegal drug smuggling and identity theft, hearing shawn whisper 'i love you' to his ex girlfriend while they were together.

"nina please." shawn begged.

"i said go!" her voice cracked, tears streaming down, but shawn shook his head.

"could you at least give me hope for us?" he knew this isn't what she wanted, but she was hurt.

"i can't give you what i already wasted for the same reason."

"d-disclosure?" he asked sighing. she agreed and shawn scooted closer to her. he tried looking into her once bright eyes, yet they were fixated onto the tile floor. he lifted her chin and she shut her eyes. shawn gulped before placing his chapped lips onto her trembling ones. minutes later, they released and he dragged himself out the door, leaving his family and nina's abuelita curious as of what happened in those cramped eight minutes.

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OMG IM SORRY IF YOU READ THIS THE FIRST TIME. I DONT KNOW WHAT HAPPENED BUT MOST OF MY WRITING WAS DELETED:(( BUT I HOPE THIS MAKE THE CHAPTER MORE APPEALING:))

ALSO IM GO-PLANNING TO UPDATE ON CHRISTMAS BUT IF NOT HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

I HOPE YOU LIKED THIS CHAPTER!

I love you💕- shaira