Torn (TWD Fan-fiction)

A Restless Night

A couple of hours after my awkward encounter with Rick's wife, everyone was huddled around their campfire. Rick and his family along with T-dog, Glenn, Andrea, Andrea's sister Amy, an older man Dale, and Rick's best friend Shane were huddled around one fire. While a man named Ed, his wife Carol and daughter Sofia were huddled around another fire. I was laying on top of the RV, watching the sky. It was cloudy so there weren't any stars to look at. I could hear the groups faint voices as they went on with their conversations. 

I couldn't stop thinking about the kiss I had with Rick. It was hard to believe how strong my feelings were for a man I had just met. A married man. Okay stop. I ran my hands through my hair in frustration. I couldn't help but feel guilty. I needed to talk to Rick but he hadn't even looked at me since the incident in the truck. Plus it didn't help that his wife had been around him all day, I mean why wouldn't she be? She had been nothing but nice to me since we got here. She deserved to know the truth but I wouldn't tell her, not without talking to Rick first.

I sat up as I heard someone coming up onto the RV. It was hard to see through all this darkness but I relaxed once I heard the familiar voice, "Hey, how's it going up here all by yourself?" I laid back down, "Hello Glenn. It's going... quiet." Yeah, except all these loud thoughts in my head.  Glenn came and sat down next to me, "You mind?" I shook my head, "Not at all. Go ahead." He laid down next to me and looked at the sky with me. "Why aren't you down there with everyone else?" He asked as he put his arms behind his head. "Just wanted some time away." I felt him tense up, "Oh sorry. If you want I can leave--" I chuckled, "No. No, you're fine. Trust me, I don't mind your presence. Not at all." He relaxed, "Haha oh okay well if you're sure." I smiled, "Mhmm." 

We were both quiet for a couple minutes. Neither of us sure of what to say. Glenn clears his throat and says, "Sooo... tomorrow. That should be fun." I turn to look at him, "What do you mean?" He turns onto his side looking towards me, "You don't know? Daryl Dixon, Merle's brother, gets back tomorrow from his hunt. He's not going to be happy about Merle." I sit up and exclaim, "Merle has a brother?!" Glenn sits up as well, "Yes, and he's going to unleash hell tomorrow when he finds out what happened to Merle." I look out into the trees, it was pitch black but I could make out some of their silhouettes. "Yikes. We better get our rest then. You don't happen to have an idea of where I might be staying do you?" He starts to stand up and walk towards the ladder, "I'm not too sure. Rick is staying with his family. The only other tent we have is Daryl's and Merle's." I stand up and walk behind him, "No thank you." He laughs a bit, "Didn't think so. Let's go over to Shane, maybe he can figure something out." 

We made our way down the RV and ran into Shane. Glenn smiled, "Shane we were just looking for you. Any idea where Ellie will be staying?" Shane looked around as he sighed, "Ehh, unless she wants to stay with Dixon maybe she can sleep in the RV with you guys." Glenn's smile got wider, "Oh yeah definitely, we can make room. I'll go tell Dale." Glenn walked over to Dale as everyone was getting up from the campfire to go to their tents. Shane smiled at me. "So you know Rick huh?" I tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear, "Yeah. Guess so. I wouldn't say I know know him because I just met him but uh yeah I guess I know him. Why?" He looked at me strange, "No reason. Ha, You're a quirky gal. You should get some shut eye." I nodded, "Thanks. You too." He leaned in for what seemed like a hug, I stuck my hand out and shook his hand. Then I quickly turned around and went inside the RV. I wanted to wait for Glenn but I wanted to get away from Shane. I feared that I might give something away if I talked to him for too long.

The air in the RV felt warmer than it did outside. I looked around, it was small and clean for the most part. I sat down at the table and closed my eyes as I leaned my head against the window. I quickly opened my eyes and sat up as I heard the RV door open. It was Glenn, he smiled and walked past me to the back. I stuck my head out into the aisle to see what he was doing, he was laying down a sleeping bag on the floor. Once he finished he walked back over to me, "You can sleep there. Dale usually tries to take turns with the bed but I usually pass. Unless I'm really tired. You know, because he's.. old." I laugh, "That's kind of you. You go ahead and sleep there though, I'll be fine here." Glenn sits down across from me, "No Ellie, really I insist." We went back and forth for a bit before I finally sighed and said, "I'll make you a deal. How 'bout I stay here and if I get too uncomfortable I'll kick you off the sleeping bag and sleep there." I gave him a smirk. He smiled as he nodded his head, "Deal." He took his cap off and went to lay down. 

I leaned my head back against the window and smiled. Besides there was no deal, I wasn't going to be kicking him off his sleeping bag because I was more than comfortable here. Boy was I wrong. I don't remember falling asleep but when I woke up my neck and back were aching like never before. I sat up and looked around, it was pitch black. I stood up quietly and walked over to Glenn, it was too dark to make out his face but he was sound asleep in his sleeping bag and Dale was snoring away. I could barely hear the rain outside from how loud his snoring was. I debated in my head whether I should try sleeping next to Glenn. Would it be weird? I decided to give it a shot, I was craving sleep so bad. I scooted my way next to Glenn and closed my eyes, his body took up more space than I thought it would. I jumped as I felt Dale tap me on my shoulder from his bed. I opened my eyes to find myself face to face with Glenn.  "Glenn? What're you doing up there?" I whispered. He gave me a confused look, "Me? The real question here is what are you doing next to Dale?" My eyes got wide, I turned and looked closer at the person in the sleeping bag. Sure enough I could make out Dales white facial hair and bald head. Oh god. I immediately stood up, I could feel my ears burning and my face getting hot. Glenn was stifling his laughter as hard as he could. Once he calmed down he motioned for me to lay next to him. There was no need to think twice about it this time. The faster I fell asleep, the faster the night would end.

Glenn fell asleep pretty fast. His body was giving off heat. It was like my own personal little heater. I closed my eyes for like 10 minutes trying to fall asleep but Dale's snoring only got louder and louder. I turned onto my side facing Glenn and tried closing my eyes. They shot wide open once Glenn grabbed me and pulled me into him. I whispered, "Glenn.." No answer. "Glenn, you awake?" He mumbled something. Well, this is awkward. I tried getting his arms off me but he only pulled me closer into his chest. He sure was strong for a little guy. What do I do? The more I pushed the tighter he held on. I was starting to freak out. I started feeling like I couldn't breathe, the walls felt like they were closing in on me, and Dale's snoring seemed like it was getting louder. "Sorry Glenn."

I gave him a small punch in his stomach, not hard enough to hurt. Just hard enough to startle him. He immediately released his grip and opened his eyes a bit, half asleep he asked, "What-- What was that?" I patted his shoulder as I said, "Shh. Shh. Shh. It's okay. You're having a dream. Go back to bed now.." He mumbled something as he fell back asleep. I let out a sigh of relief. I have to get out of here. I stood up and quietly made my way outside. It was pouring rain but I didn't care. It was nice to have fresh air and room to breathe. I stood in the middle of the rain for a bit, letting the rain drops hit my face. I started walking towards the trees, following a small path. A million thoughts racing through my head. I started walking faster and faster. I couldn't stop thinking about Rick. About Morgan and Duane. Were they okay? Were they safe? I couldn't stop thinking about Merle and how he was left up on the rooftop with no water, no food, nothing. I couldn't stop thinking about what was going to happen once his brother returned. The chaos that would ensue. By this point I was running, mud flinging all over my skin and clothes. I dropped to my knees as my mom and dad's face came into my mind. Tears were running down my face, the sound of the thunder drowning out my screams. I lost track of time. I don't know how long I was kneeling in the mud for but I was certain of one thing.

I knew what I had to do, I had to leave.