Always

Chapter 1

Chapter 1

"Tama na! This is your last straw Alexis! I can't tolerate you anymore. Doon ka na sa Baguio mag-aaral whether you like it or not!" my dad is yelling at me again. I can't blame him, kasalanan ko naman talaga eh. Natatawa lang ako kasi wala na akong pakialam kung san niya ako ipapatapon. Like the hell I care.

I just stared at him boredly. Then what are you waiting for? Send me to Baguio for all I care. Nakatingin lang ako sa kanya the whole time he's looking at me furiously, waiting for my answer.

"Ok." is all I can say. Alam kong mangyayari parin at mangyayari ang mga ginawa ko dito sa Manila doon. Sawang sawa na rin ako sa istilo ng pamumuhay ko dito. Inom, hazing, billiards. And this routine has been wearing me out lately. I want something different. I want something real.

"Ok?" dad said obviously not believing what he just heard. "You'll go?" he reassures.

"Yeah, pagod na rin ako sa routine ng buhay ko dito. Nakakasawa na." I truthfully answered him. He seemed buffled but he quickly recovers.

"Ok, you'll stay with your tita. Wala nang bawian." he said again full of authority. Huh, please. "Fine, fine." I said rolling my eyes.

I ponder this new thing I've just entered myself into. Baguio? Sana nga makamit ko dun yung hindi ko mahanap dito sa Manila. Sana hindi ko maranasan yung mga naranasan ko dito. I really need to have a brand new start. A new beggining.

As I start to pack my things, I'm willing to leave my old things and old self. But there's two things I won't be able to leave - my secrets and my past.

--

The day has come for me to go. I don't think I'm ready to go but I have to. Four hours bago ang trip ko, it's 8 in the evening at nakaupo lang ako dito sa kwarto, nakatitig lang sa mga nakakarton na mga gamit ko. Sa mga maleta ko, sa kwarto ko at sa isang kahang sigarilyo na nakapatong sa kama ko.

Bakit ba ako kinakabahan? I feel uneasy. Ano kayang kalalabasan ng magiging buhay ko doon? Mababago kaya ang pagkatao ko?

I was pulled from my train of thoughts nang magtext yung kaibigan ko.

Trixie: pumunta ka ngayon sa meeting place natin. Meeting daw urgent.

Me: hindi ako pwede ngayon, may byahe ako.

Trixie: basta pumunta ka nalang, importante.

Me: sige pero saglit lang ha?

Trixie: oo, halika na bago magalit si Jero.

--

Pagkarating ko sa meeting place namin, tinginan lahat sila sa akin. Mabilis lang naman to eh, kaya tumakas lang ako.

I feel I'm being burned with there stares. Habang papalapit ako ng papalapit there stares grow intense. I spot Ree with an empty space beside her.

Pagkaupo ko walang nagsasalita. "Tungkol san tong meeting?" tanong ko kay Ree. "Makinig ka nalang." she said pulling her hair to one side habang humihithit sa yosi niya. Inalok niya sa akin yung isang nasa tenga niya kaya inabot ko naman. Sinindihan ko at humithit agad. Pagkahithit ko, nagsalita si Alfred.