The Sweetest Feeling

Chapter Twenty-Nine

We have climbed to the top of a hill that looks over the whole town; the view is something my Nan would have loved. "She brought me up here when we were discussing the house, told me it was her favourite place as a child. That's why I thought it would be a good spot" he says. "Thank you, it's perfect. Will you do it for me? I don't think I can"
"Of course just stand back a bit" He gently scatters her ashes and they are swept up with the wind just as the sun appears. My emotions get the better of me as my tears gently flow. "Oh Emily, it's ok; she is in a much better place now" he says giving me a friendly hug. He helps me down the hill and we walk back towards the house. "Do you have any plans this evening?" He asks. "No, I was going to go back to my hotel and just have dinner" I say. "Well I am going into town, I am singing in a local pub. Would you like to come?"
"That sounds like fun, count me in" He goes to shower and change, so I take the time to look around the main house. After all it's what I came to do. The walls have been stripped and painted a basic cream colour, the house is fresh and clean just waiting for someone to come along and furnish it. The kitchen and bathrooms have been updated and the old fireplaces restored, it really is a beautiful house. I found out that my paternal grandfather left the house to me along with a rather large trust fund, my parents could live here and when I turned eighteen it would all be mine. He died not long after I was born, I think this is another reason my dad resented me; he thought it should all be his. My mum came back here when she was released, I think being in the house on her own and sober enough to realise what she had done is what set her on the path to insanity. When she was institutionalised is obviously when Nan came back here and left Brendan in charge of the house. I need to talk to him about his plans for the future; then I will decide what to do about this place. I go back to the guest house and leave Brendan a note to meet me at the hotel at seven.

I'm talking to Nathan via Skype on my laptop, while I am getting changed. "So let me get this straight Emily, you went away to deal with everything by yourself but end up spending all your time with some guy"
"Nathan, it isn't like that. I used to have this memory of spending one summer with an older boy who would bring me food and keep me company. I always thought I imagined the whole thing but turns out it did happen and that boy was Brendan. Anyway he had an arrangement with Nan that he would look after the main house and live in the guest house for free. I got caught in the rain earlier and he helped me out. He is just being friendly. I promise you have nothing to worry about.
Do you not trust me?" I ask. "Of course I do Charms, it's just hard knowing you're there and I'm stuck here when I want to be with you"
"I will be home before you know it, Curly. I'm going to visit my mum tomorrow and then I just have to decide what to do with the house. I have to go now but I will phone you tomorrow, I am going to need to hear your voice. I love you" I say smiling at him. "I love you too, be careful"

Brendan is waiting in the lobby "You look nice" he says giving me another of his bear hugs. It's only a short walk to the pub but he is taking me to get something to eat first. We talk a lot over dinner, he is such great company and I know Nathan would like him. "I see you're engaged. Is he a decent guy?" He asks over dessert. "Yes, he is the best" I say not being able to stop the smile that spreads from ear to ear. "What about you?" He shakes his head "I haven't found the right woman, anyway I always find the best ones are taken" he says winking at me making me blush. "What are your plans? For the future I mean"
"If you want me to move out Emily, I understand, but could you just give me some time" I put my hand up to stop him talking. "I wasn't going to ask you to move out I just need to know what your plans are, Brendan; if you want to stay that's perfectly fine with me" I say tapping his hand. "Oh well yes, I would like to stay for a bit longer, I do want to move to London actually. Maybe this is the push I need"

The pub is crowded; smelling of real ale and sweaty men. There is a live band and a friendly atmosphere; this is my kind of place. I am sat on a small table to the side of the stage, watching Brendan do his thing. He is so wasted here. "Thank you. Now this next song is for an old friend who has finally come back home. You all know it and I expect to see everyone up dancing, including you" he says winking at me. I am dragged up to dance to 'Galway Girl' by Steve Earle.
"Now, I would like my old friend to join me on stage, everyone give her a warm Connemara welcome" he says as someone passes him another guitar. He is smiling but I want to kill him, I told him I was only here to listen. I take the guitar and the same person then brings me a stool, Brendan waits for me to adjust, I already know what song he wants us to sing. 'Bring It on Home To Me' by Sam Cooke. It's such a beautiful song, one of my favourites. I sure hope Brendan is just good at capturing the emotion of a song and making it believable because he has sung every song to me tonight and it seems like he means every word. No, I'm sure I'm just being silly; my emotions keep getting the better of me in the short time I have been here.

I have been so distracted by my thoughts I haven't heard Brendan just tell the crowd I would sing for them. I look up at his crooked smile and realise I would do anything for him; he is the only good thing from my childhood.
"Thank you everyone for being so kind. This is a wonderful town and I'm glad to be back here. I am going to sing a song that my Grandfather used to sing to my Grandma and please do sing along" I say before singing 'Boston Rose' by The Wolftones.
Outside the hotel it's time to say goodnight, Brendan has kindly walked me back. I am so exhausted, so much has happened today and I just need to sleep. "I will drive you tomorrow" he says. "Thank you that would be great and thanks for today it's been emotional" I say as he hugs me goodbye. He smiles at me and walks away into the night, leaving me alone with my thoughts.