The Sweetest Feeling

Chapter Twenty-Eight

I have eaten a hearty breakfast as I'm not sure I will eat again till later and I need to keep my strength up. I have my wellies on, water in my rucksack and Mr Shuffle to keep me company on the walk ahead. Patrick, my new friend from the desk who helped me with my bags, waves as I walk past. Flashing him a smile I walk outside, I don't know if I am really ready for this but I need to see the house where I spent those unhappy early years.

I am so glad I decided to walk, the scenery is spectacular. I've never seen so much green in my life, it's refreshing and soothing, so peaceful and calm unlike the busy dirty streets and concrete jungle that is London Town. I am nearly there when the heavens open and heavy rain pours down, soaking me through. I break out into a run and soon see the house up ahead. I stop outside, no longer caring about the rain, I don't know why but I expected the house to be dark and uncared for, one of those places you look at and just know something bad happened there. That's not what I am faced with; it's a gorgeous house, pale blue with a yellow door. Flowers lining the path and a large apple tree with what looks like a pond next to it. This house looks warm and inviting, it looks loved. I've been standing here staring for so long that I haven't noticed the man now at my side. "Can I help you?" He asks making me jump. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. Look you're soaked to the bone, please come in and dry off" he says moving passed me and opening the gate. I follow him up the path and into the house. Standing frozen in the hallway, I feel like I can't breathe, the walls feel like they are closing in. I fumble behind me for the handle, fling open the door and just make it to the road before I throw up.

I am now sitting at a kitchen table in jogging bottoms and an oversized shirt, my hair still damp from the shower he insisted I took. We are no longer in the main house but a small attached guest house. "You should dry your hair you know. I have a hair dryer in the bedroom" he says pointing down the hall. He's right I can't afford to get ill. I stand up as he shows me the way, I feel much better when I'm finished and go back to the kitchen to find a cup of tea and a slice of chocolate cake waiting for me. "Now are you ready to tell me who you are or why you are here?" He asks sitting down next to me. We look at each other properly for the first time and I notice how ruggedly handsome he is, he is broad and made up of pure muscles with beautiful piercing blue eyes.
"Oh my word, It's you. It's Emily isn't it?" He says through his shock. "Yes that's me" I whisper. "As soon as I looked into those eyes I knew it was you, I could never forget those eyes. So beautiful yet so full of pain" he says. "Have we met before?"
"Yes, I don't expect you to remember you were so young"
"The field, the boy; that was you?" I ask as I recognise his face.
"Yes that was me, I stumbled across you one day when I was exploring, I thought you were lost but when I asked you where you lived you pointed to this house. You could only have been about three"
"Wow, I thought I imagined you. They are the only nice memories I have of my childhood and I thought I made them up. What's your name?"
"Brendan. I used to spend my summers here with my aunt and uncle who lived up the road. I spent most days with you that summer; I used to bring you food because I could tell you weren't being fed. You didn't talk just enjoyed being in my company I think then when I came back the following summer my aunt told me what happened. I was so sad I wouldn't get to see you again but happy that you were finally away from here"

We sit in silence while we sip tea and eat cake. I notice his guitar in the corner, I wonder if he is any good? "Are you feeling better now?" He asks distracting me. "Yes, sorry about that, it was all a bit much I think, you know after all this time"
"Yes I can imagine. Your clothes won't be dry for a while, if you do want to take a look just let me know" He says kindly before clearing my now empty plate. "So how come you're here now?"
"Well my aunt and uncle sold up years ago and I was living with them at the time, I had nowhere to go. I used to hide in the barn out back sometimes and write songs, that's where she found me. She told me her name was Mary and she needed someone to look after the house, we agreed I could live here as long as I looked after the place. I've been here ever since and that's why the house looks so good" he says. "That was my Nan; she kept a lot from me over the years. I only found out a few days ago that my mum is still alive and I own this place. I found it all in a journal she had written. I'm still in shock to be honest. For years I have believed my mum killed herself but she is right here, just a few miles away in an institution"
"Wow. That's a lot to deal with. So what are your plans?" He asks nervously.
"No idea yet, I'm only here for two more days. I have two things I need to do for sure though, visit my mum and scatter my Nan's ashes" I tell him. "Well, I know the perfect place for you to do that. I can take you later if you like" he offers. "That would be so kind of you. Did you say you write songs?" I ask changing the subject. "Yes I do, I don't know if they are any good but it's all I've ever wanted to do"
"Can I hear one?"
He fetches his guitar and sits back down opposite me. He sings with such passion in his voice, its breathtaking, I want to hear more. His words are full of meaning, I believe everything he is singing; it's the best piece of song writing I've heard in a long time. "You are seriously talented. I was captivated by that song. Would you mind if I play for a bit?"
"You play? Sure go ahead" he says handing me the guitar. This is what I've missed the most. Behind a guitar is where I am home. Turns out we like a lot of the same music, our tastes are both extremely varied, we sit and jam for hours, until my clothes come out the dryer.

"Thank you so much for your hospitality, I don't know what I would have done without you" I say handing him back his folded clothes. "No need to thank me, it's my pleasure. Now should I take you to that spot I was telling you about?"
"Yes please. I'd like that"