The Girl They Couldn't Find

Chapter 44

It wasn't just about the boy.

To whoever is reading this, I hope that you'll never have to experience what I did, during 2016 and 2017.
I have always loved Lucas Friar, but I love my best friend, Maya Hart, more.
It broke my heart to see them together, knowing that they're happy, and that he will never love me.
I remember what she said to me when she first told me.
Stop expressing your feelings Riley.
They came that day.
I remember at first, they were merely shadows, lurking in dark corners, with only a slippery grasp on life. Their words were merely empty thoughts, that with enough strength, I could force into the back of my mind.
But as each day wore on, I felt the strings of my heart unravel. My friends were all happy, obvious to what I had done for them.
The dark clouds that followed me everywhere I went grew darker as the storm approached.
And then she found out.
I never knew her name, but she saw my notebook.
Suddenly, the whole school knew, and every day, I'd suffer the wrath of words.
Even Rileytown wasn't safe.
I didn't tell my friends, because last time I was bullied, it was only one person.
But this time, there were more.
Social media became a torture chamber, where everyone took the opportunity to sneer and hurt that awkward, gangly brunette who's overly optimistic and won't shut up.
Suddenly, the demons grew stronger. I don't know how, but they became almost...real.
They could hold objects, they could cause physical pain to me and other people.
Their eyes were pure black.
Their whispers of poison never left my mind, as I cried myself to sleep each night.
Maya and Lucas broke up, but the demons immediately took advantage of my weakness, and I fell victim to darkness.
Insecure.
Anxious.
Depressed.
Suicidal.
Haunted.
I wanted to run but their chains were to strong.
She stared, her eyes goring into my worthless soul.
He left me in the mornings, senseless and only able to remember the pain.
She hissed into my ear, malevolence pouring form her mouth.
He gave me the knife.
Finally, after so many months they were gone.
But everyone thought it was about the boy.
The bullying continued, but I ignored it.

Whoever you are, I hope that you will never have to be there if the demons come again, because if they do, I do not think that the rope supporting me on the cliff of life will be able to stop my fall.
At least you know that it wasn't just about the boy.
And if you are ever hurt, there will always be a place in Rileytown for you.
-Riley Matthews :)