Tyler had left soon enough, we'd talked, eaten, watched a movie and did the general bro stuff. But he explained why he was confused and I understood him completely
You see, Tyler didn't really believe in his God even though his family where religious and had fears of being gay. As well as his friend group where not exactly diverse like me and I guess that's why he could open up to me more. He loved his family and he'd never had problems, he just had slight anxiety and was expected to be the man as he called it.
I guess that why he was so harsh in school, because he was afraid
But he left out the me part. The part where he grabbed my hand when he first saw me, the part where he blushed immensely when I strocked his arm and also the part where he laughed when I shoved his friend. I didn't want to push him into anything but I had feelings too, and I wanted to relax. But I was worried
That's what you get for being clingy, Josh
I sat down and grabbed a piece of paper, I liked to vent write and post it to tumblr. I got support there and I felt safe so that's what I did
I'll claw away my fears
Don't dismay my tears
Depression? -Nope, cleared!
And this is what you'll hearFetchin compressing my doubts
But I won't say this outloud
As my voice is low and my lungs are weak
My feelings will begin to leakBut don't bust the bubble
My skin is not rubble
Humble verses written in emotion
Sorry for the commotion
But am I the only one feeling this tonne?Sorry I'm at it again, but I promise I'm done
I'll see you later huh?
Just remember we are oneI breathed heavily leaning back, scratching my head slightly. All these emotions I couldn't handle but I did
I did
And I do
And I guess I'm proud of myself, for that. For this, for every breathe I make because I know that I'm closer to my death every minute
But I still live
Short chapter sorry babes lmao what even is that word
Fyi, they where some of my vent lyrics :))
I hope you have a good day, ily!
-Fran |-/
YOU ARE READING
"Standards" -Joshler
FanficFor a boy, Josh didn't meet the general standards He wasn't your typical teenager Football? Party's? Girls? Nah Music, Netflix and Guys