RAISING SUMMER

MY LITTLE SISTER

It's nearly been three weeks since Rachel died. I had to postpone the funeral in an attempt to get ahold of Luke. I reached out to his bandmates. Still unsure if they relayed my message.
The funeral is arranged just waiting for a date. Received Rachel's death certificate already, I had to set it on my bed looking at it felt too final. Summer and I have a schedule but we are still adjusting. Debating on when I should move Summer into my place living in Rachel's home felt like chasing a ghost. I was suffocating in my grief. Rachel left her house but it felt wrong staying here.
I was constantly on edge trying to reach out to Luke. I don't understand my little me had a crush on him. He wasn't always like this. He used to be kind and attentive. The old Luke would never ghost me for weeks and never not pick up for his sister either. Rested on the couch as summer slept in her swing. I'm too scared to let her sleep in her nursery. Maybe that will change but for now the couch is my home.
I woke to frantic knocks and doorbell rings. I pulled out my phone and it was only 1: 35 in the morning. I had only been asleep for three hours. I glanced at Summer and she was still fast asleep. I yanked myself up from the couch and dragged myself to the door.

"Just one second!" I demanded yanking the front door open. A shadowy figure stood in the musky April morning rain. I turned on the front door light. Light brown waves short along the sides and longer on the top, which laid over his forehead with the rain and emerald green eyes. It was like looking at Rachel again. I stepped back in shock. He was wearing a leather jacket, a deep gray shirt, blue jeans and boots. It took me a while to recognize him. I swung the door open frantically.

"Luke?" My heart plummeted.
"Long time no see, Janey." He brushed past me "Sorry about the delay." He apologized.

"The delay?" I grind my teeth together trying not to be cruel in my sleep deprivation.

"It's been almost three weeks since I called you Luke! Three weeks! What the hell is wrong with you?" I scolded him. He pulled out blue silvery balloons from behind his back with a roguish grin. My heartbeat rang in my ears. He has no clue.

"Where is my nephew?" He asked.

"Nephew?" I asked.

"Yeah." His eyes searched.

"First off, your niece!" I explained.

"A girl?" His eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"Yes." I stammered.

"That's impossible." He shook his head. "Really?" He questioned.

"Yeah." I huffed.

"What's her name?" He asked.

"Summer Jane Barrett." I answered.

"Where's Rachel?" He asked.

"Rachel." I stammered and my heartbeat rushed to my ears, my stomach turned. I can't do this, I'm going to throw up.

"Yeah you know, your velcro bestie, my sister, where is she?" He asked.

"Luke..." A deep sinking pit in my stomach became deeper.

"What." He looked at me in confusion.

"I tried to tell you...." I choked back a sob.

"Tell me what?" He interrupted me.

"Rachel, she's....."

"In her room? at the store? What? I thought you got rid of your stuttering." He teased but his face fell flat when he looked at mine.

"She's gone."

"Gone where? Spit it out Janey." He looked agitated.

"Rachael's dead." I sobbed.

"Jane, you and Rachel really need to stop that stuff, we aren't six years old anymore." He looked at me. "Where is she really?"

"I tried to tell you, I'm so sorry."

"STOP JOKING AROUND JANE!" He demanded. "RACHEL!" Summer woke up and started to cry. He called out looking for her and looked around the house.

"Luke." I tried to calm him down and went to get him in Rachel's room. I found him silently staring at my bed where I stashed all of the important medical papers. Rachel's death certificate was laying on top of all of the papers.

"What is this?" He held up the certificate.

"That's her death certificate." I explained. He examined it as his eyes filled with tears and his jaw ticked.

"No! This can't be real." He threw the paper at me. " preeclampsia?" He shook his head. "My little sister is not gone!" He demanded.

"Luke, I know it's hard to believe......."

"SHE'S NOT GONE!" He yelled as Summer's cry became more dominant over Luke's tempered voice. I went to go get her. As I picked the frantic child up I turned to see Luke heading for the door. I tried to catch up with him.

"Luke, don't go. You shouldn't be alone right now."

"It's not true!" He frantically grabbed his things. He turned to me, he stopped to notice the little girl in my arms. He walked closer to me. "Is that?"

"Summer."

"Summer?" He looked at her strangely, his breaths coming out shallow. "Can I?" He asked.

"I need you to take a second to breathe."  I begged. After taking a moment to compose himself I placed her in his arms. The silence stretched on forever.

"She's really gone. Isn't she?" He tried to comprehend. I nodded in response. Tears started to appear from his eyes. "She's all I had." He cried. "I have no one."

"That's not true." I sobbed.

"She looks just like her." He cradled the baby girl. "My little sister." He sobbed. "I can't, I'm sorry, I have to go." He sniffed handing Summer back to me.

"Luke, wait." I shouted after him but all that I got in return was the door closing.