I am NOT an elfling

Making Friends

After crying, falling asleep and waking up again, I felt more tired than ever before. I kinda remember some distant shouting whilst I slept, though that could have been a dream. After lying awhile, lost in thought, I get up. Slipping from the covers, I walk to my ( well, not really my) door and open it. However, that may not have been the best idea, because *SMACK*.....and, Thorin officially is gonna hate me forever. After a suddenly very shocked ( and angry) Thorin comes out of his well, shock, he goes to yell. However I, tired of all this mess, quickly jumps in before he has a chance to open his mouth ( I have come to see that is the best tactic when talking to him).

"Hello, I am soooooooo sorry, I really had no idea you were out there, but its kinda good, well not you being whacked in the face and all, but you being here, you see, I kinda really wanna talk to you in private" I do? Yes! I do! I shall talk this out and make it all better. Thorin, still looking angry, but slightly intrigued by my very fast speech spits out " Fine! However if this turns out as just another vicious waste of my time I swear I will-" "-It wont be!!" I jump in quickly. Stepping back inside my room I let Thorin in through the door and then close it after him.

He simply stands there, so embarrassed I start " Ok. I just wanted to say-" I take a big deep breath "- sorry" Thorin looks shocked at this. I continue " Sorry, I am so so sorry. Look, I know we have gotten off on the wrong foot ( he looks confused at this) but I really want you to like me". ( He snorts at this). "No! Seriously! I like idolise you!! You are amazing!! I grew up with stories of you! All of you!!-" I gestured outside "-You guys are all like heroes! And we dont have that back home. Where I come from its just boring, learn, work, kids, die. No adventure. No fighting goblins, or trolls, or rock giants, or dragons, just, same thing, same people, everyday, always. And it sucks!! Ive always wanted to travel, but travelling back home takes money, a lot of it."

"Anyway I grew up with you guys, you taught me things, even if you never met me. Determination. Loyalty. Kinship. I heard about how you fought with you family. Your friends. How joked and rode together and I wanted the same thing. Maybe I over romanticised it in my head, made things up, but I have always have had this glowing image of you. And.....I'm sorry. I just don't know whats going on. I'm everywhere. I can't think strait. I don't understand. Magic is not real where I come from, so I just can't understand being here. I feel insane. Torn in two. And I'm sorry for being so annoying...and mean, I just can't control myself....and I don't know why......"

I dropped to my knees....why?? And of course I was crying, damnit! Thorin looked at me for a second, his yes unreadable. Then, slowly, he dropped to his kneels. He laid a hand on my should, then quickly, swift as a snake, .picked me up. Why does everyone keep doing this?!?!? He held me for a while and I cried, I tried not to, but we all know how well thats been going lately. Sigh. He muttered something. Ayyyy mate! That is soooo not English!! Breath. I wiped away the last of my tears and ...ew....snot...shudder...on my sleeve, again, ewww and looked up at him. Whoops, I think I may have ruined his coat. Nice going Ashley, no better way to get people to like you than to defile their clothing, anyway, not the point. I look at him. He looks back. There is silence. I open my mouth and go to talk, " I-" , but Thorin interrupts me "It's ok".

I blinked. Say whaaaa? He clears his throat " I know I have been rather, suspicious, and whilst I shall not apologise for that, I will admit I was wrong in my actions. I should not have treated as I did. it was unkind, especially after what you have been through", he sighs, " I have treated you cruelly and not have helped as I should have.". I have a soft, sad sounding giggle "I's ok, I've been rather rude after all-" he interrupts me though " You need not apologise. You are a child, wether you agree with that or not-" he gave me a look as I opened my mouth in protest, "-and elf or not, children should be protected. I have acted, rather shamefully, in my treatment of you-'' again I go to protest but he continues "- and I intend to make up for it. I cannot say I fully believe your story-" he frowns a bit at this "-still, I do believe something has happened to you." he finishes. Well, I guess its better than nothing. I smile a bit and hold him tighter. "So we're ok?". "We are all good" he says softly, and simply rocks me for what could be a forever until...."Finally!" says a voice for the door. I feel Thorin turn at brake-kneck speed, but the speaker is already long gone down the hall. Exchanging chuckles and comment with the others.

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AN: I know its ridiculously short and I have left updating so long no one may actually still be reading, but I aim to be more constant in my updates. Actually, I am writing the next chap now! (;