I am NOT an elfling

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I am so frickin' bored i am doing math ( insert mental congratulations for not swearing), well not math exactly, but close enough. After about an hour of 1+1=2, 2+2=4, 4+4=8, 8+8=16, 16+16=32, 32+32=64, 64+64=128, 128+128=2..56, 256+256=..5..12,512+512=1024.....and...i frickin' give up ( repeat). Sooo... I would say I'm pretty bored..and in pain. The goblins really do know how to be thorough, bastards. I wonder if there are female goblins, quite frankly i am not quite sure i want to know. I don't really know how long I've been here, i would guess a week or two, most of the time I'm unconscious. The goblins have taken to beating me, jabbing things at me, throwing things at me, and the scary dark things my mind had blocked from my memory. Theres been no rape, i would know, plus if you rape and elf the die before you start ( yep, wiki) but the fiery dark memories half hidden in my brain are enough to give anyone nightmares.

Im battered and bruised all over, my throat is raw, my nose is blocked, my eyes sting and i am covered in wounds ( plus i think i strained my ankle). Escaping has been a fail, I'm never actually more than semi conscious when my cage is lowered down and......and some things are best not said. Im the most coherent I've been all week, yet i still feel like puking just sitting up. Ive always thought people in stories like this were weak, but now i know better, they are so strong just for surving, and there is no shame in being rescued. Each time i wake i pray for a saviour, i hate to admit it, but i really don't think i can save myself.

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There here......I'm assuming, well someones here, I've never seen the goblins so happy, and i have been here far to long if i can tell if their happy or not. I am actually pretty good for someone half dead, i blame it on adrenaline and my new elvish abilities. I am really craving watermelon..what? Im weird like that. Either way, another way i know they are here is because i saw them walking below me, thank god i was awake, now to get out, find them, and accompany them on the way out....i am screwed. I also think I'm getting a fever, great.

Now, escape attempt no 1. Scream at the to of my lungs.....ARGHHHHHHHHH!!!! Ouch! Ouch! Ouch! My throat! Great, that just made the goblins laugh. Escape attempt no 2. Try to make the cage fall.....nope, not working, i swear though, I'm like putting on a show . Escape attempt no 3. "TAKE ME TO YOUR LEADER!!!!" Ok, that one was a long shot, and i am seriously feeling like a comedy show. Escape attempt no 4. Dramatically faint..now!
Ok, technically speaking the last one may not have been a plan, but it did happen.
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Eppp!!! I would scream properly, but quite frankly my throat hurts. Falling, so fast i hit the top of my cage. I see glimpses of dead goblins, live goblins, and the goblin king, dead! Thorin must have come and tore everything to shreds! Wow i was right before, i thought i was, but i didn't believe it. Its funny how much you can see in a split second, the grimy walls, falling cages, wood and metal, screams ( well technically you cant see them) and a whole lot of darkness and light all at once.

Funny enough, i don't faint when i hit the ground. I fall back ( not that far) to the bottom of my cage, my heads spins, my vision goes black and starry, i fell nauseated and I tightly shut my eyes, but i don't faint.I'm relieved i didn't, if i had i might have just been left here. I hear talking, and movement, but I'm to afraid to move, I'm in too much pain. Then i groan. A small sound, but these are warrioprs, i hear movement close to my cage and i try to open my eyes, that just makes me feel more sick though, so i close them. My ears finally stop ringing ( a little) and i hear conversation around me. " Should we kill it?" " Kili!" "What?" " Enough! Gandalf?" " i dont know Thorin, i do not know" I'm guessing the voices were Kilis, Filis, Thorins and Gandalfs, and i was pretty sure of my guess. " What do you think it is"'says another voice " Do you think its dangerous?". "For goodness sakes" cried fili? " Its probably a poor small animal or something". " Well, theres only one way to find out" says ??. Slam, my cages breaks around me, the roof falls on my back, agony.

"Bofur!" Cries Thorin, and i have a sneaky suspicion there are a lot of weapons pointed at me. My strength seems to be slowly filtering back into my body, and i painfully look up, revealing my face and more importantly my ears. The metal clanks to the ground and i stand up, and nothing happens. I slowly open my eyes to see some quickly coming into focus figures, they all stare at me in shock. I sway slightly and Gandalf springs to action, hr kneels at my feet and holds my steady with his staff free arm. He looks at my weirdly, like I'm the most most happiest most beautiful thing he could see, yet somehow the saddest and most painful, he looks at me like I'm a broken master piece of art, or a wild tropical forest burnt and destroyed.

He looks at my like I'm a broken elfling, the last Elfling thousands of years ( the last was Arwen..yes i knie, Wiki) he looks at me like i represent broken innocence and the death of all that was once beautiful in the world. I feel like an imposter, i shouldn't be here, i shouldn't have this body , i don't deserve this look. I must have teared up, not that i wasn't already crying, that hurt, because he murmured something to me, something soft and sweet, something that sounded like china and the wind, something that sounded like song and perfection, something that didn't understand in the slightest.

" Err, um, sorry, but i have no idea what in the world you just said to me...err..thanks??" Ok, i am not so good at thinking under pressure. The dwarves were a mixture between shocked and amused, and nearly all of them had dropped their weapons down. What? Am i not threatening enough? humph! Wait....ok Ashley, keep focused. Gandalf however was rendered speachless. Wait! I hope i speak the common tongue, it sounds like English but i hope it is, otherwise im screwed! " Little one.." Gandalf started. Yah ! I understood! Wait! Little?!?

"Its alright, I'm Gandalf the Grey, you're safe now" said....you guessed it! Gandalf! Ok, I'm losing it. " Yeah, um , hi? Thanks for that i guess, nice to know, I'm Ashley by the way. Um, I'm fine..ish?. Gandalf looked at me with his trade mark thinking look from the movies and all the other seemed to be trying to decipher what i say. From my knowledge of fanfiction, and yes i do read it, i can assume he is properly puzzling over why i speak the common tongue and not elvish, why my way of speaking is so different from his  ( i assume he will assume its because I'm all messed up from being here) and how i got here in the first place.

Things were getting kind of awkward, and i am nor good at kind of awkward, so i decide to break the silence " Sooooo......not to be rude or anything, but shouldn't be be like running...NOW!" The last bit came out as a bit of a scream because just then a goblin sprang out of nowhere and tried to stab the closest dwarf, Ori, Dori quickly dispatched it as Ori wasn't looking and everyone turned to me again. My hands where over my ears, i panic at loud noises, always have, you should see me with whistles. Thorin stepped forward and spoke " The Elf is right, we must continue onward. The others quickly bustled around and i went to move forward, i would rather die than run right now, but i didn't have a choiEPP!! Or maybe i did, Gandalf had swiftly picked me up, and man he is strong for an old guy, he looked at me kindly then all the dwarves started running forward, towards the mouth of the cave.