Angels in Hell (Larry Stylinson)

Chapter 39

August 23rd, 2019

Dear Louis,

Since you'll never read this, I guess I could tell you the truth. My secrets. Some things I've never told you. I've told Josh Devine, but never you. I know you told me that we shouldn't keep secrets from each other and that we can tell each other anything. I'm sorry, but I just never felt comfortable telling you these things.

First of all, I'm bisexual. I found out when I started crushing on this guy. Guys don't simply start crushing on other guys. So that's how I found out. I've never liked any other guy except him. I think he is beautiful. Perfect like an angel.

Secondly, and lastly, I love you. And I know that's no secret, but I mean it differently than you think. You were the guy who I said I have a crush on. I'm not saying that I want to be your boyfriend or anything. I'm just stating it.

I know that if you ever do read this, this may be a shock to you. Since I could never tell you these things in person, I thought I could tell you like this. I'm only twelve, so it's not like I could date you anyways. (But you will wait for me, right? I'll be old enough to date you someday... Just saying. *Wink, wink*)

Yours truly,
Harry

June 17th, 2026
Alternate Universe

I smile. After I read Harry's letter to me, I wrote my letter to him and put them away. I just can't believe that Harry has a crush on me. Or at least used to. Who knows if he still does. Why does he have to say things like that? He thinks I'm beautiful? And how did I not know he was bisexual? Was I not observant enough? The big question is: Is Harry bisexual on the other world?

There was this one night on the other world where Harry did seem gay and I thought that he might've felt the same way about me. It was at a private party where you had to be invited to attend it.

*Flashback*

That night, I was excited about the huge party. I was also really excited to see Harry. But when am I not excited to see him? Everytime I see him I get nervous. Butterflies in my stomach, sweaty palms, and sometimes even stuttering. As I entered that club, I couldn't help but think about Harry all dressed up and that made me even more thrilled to be there. I kept thinking, "I hope he's still coming!" I looked around for him. I saw people I recognized, but I didn't stop to say "hi" or wave to anyone. I wanted Harry.

Now that I think about it, that was probably really rude. I ignored a lot of people. Although, all I was thinking of at that moment was Harry. He consumes my thoughts. Then, I saw him. And he saw me. I lost my breath and quickly turned away, fixing my hair the best I could. I turned back around and saw... he's gone.

"Where did he go?" I thought.

I looked around quickly for him. I felt like I was playing hide and seek. Only when I found him, I felt like I lost. There he was dancing with a man. They were grinding on each other. I tried to turn my face, but I couldn't no matter how much I wanted to. The man was looking at him like he was meat. With so much lust... it disgusted me. I wanted to pull him away and call him mine so no one else could touch him. But then it hit me.

The question. Why is he even dancing with a man? What happened to the "ladies man" Harry? Why isn't he dancing with the girls? There were plenty of girls there. Is he bisexual? Gay? These many questions raced through my head, but I was still jelous... and upset. Harry deserved better than that man whore he was dancing with. I finally got the strength to turn away and sit at the bar.

I got a beer and stared off into space. I was thinking about how he is practically my life. I know I don't deserve someone like him. I can't help but love him, though. And want him. There is suddenly a tap on my shoulder. The touch sent tingles down my spine. I turned toward the person and wasn't surprised to see Harry. His touch is the only touch that feels like that. He was beyond perfect looking like always with dimples, out of control hair (that I found very attractive), and warm eyes.

"Hey," Harry's deep, husky voice said. "I thought you saw me, but you turned away."

I shrugged and forced a smile. I can't help but smile around him, forced or not. I looked into his eyes. He wasn't drunk. I can always tell if he is or not if I look in his eyes. So, dancing with that douche was no accident.

"Could I sit here?" Harry asked pointing at the seat next to me.

I nodded. He climbed into the chair and smiled at me, making my heart race.

"Did you know you still get my heart racing?" Harry said suddenly.

I looked at him in surprise.

"What?"

"Nothing..."

"Did you know you still get my heart racing?"

I smiled to myself. It's like he read my mind. What did he mean by that?

*End of Flashback*

So, maybe he's bisexual on the other world. Maybe not. It doesn't matter anyways. He'll never be mine. However, I will never stop trying. I decide to take a little car ride to clear my mind. I grab my keys and put my phone in my pocket, then making my way out to my car. As I drive to no where in particuliar, I think about that night with Harry at the club. How my feelings went from excited to mad to sad to happy in minutes. I almost felt bipolar that night.

I think about how one boy can do all of these things to me. Can make me feel all of these feelings. Because of him, I rack my brain for answers. He is the only one I see and that's one thing that will never change. I will never stop choosing him. I never loved someone like I love him. And yes, love. It started as a crush, but then grew into something infinite. Our love is infintite. I hear my phone beep, making me jump a little.

The traffic is kind of bad, so I don't think it will hurt to take out my phone. A text from... Holy shit.

From My little angel:
To Boo Bear:
Lou-Lou, I'm on my way home. Are you at the house? xxx

Tears begin to fall down my cheeks and an unexplainable amount of excitement courses through my body. I fumble for my phone while trying to keep my eyes on the road. I should pull over... but I really want to text back.

From Boo Bear:
To My little angel:
I'll be there soon. I love you, Har-

CRASH

I should've pulled over.