Unreal (KaiStal f.f)

Ch. 20

My body feels lifeless as I open my eyes and enter the real world once again out of the many days before this one. I cough and sit up, rubbing my eyes until they feel itchy.

"How are you feeling?"

I look up and see Jongin standing there with a bowl of ramen and a bottle of water in his hand. Because of the incident that happened last night, I try to avoid his eyes and bite my lip. No use, honestly. I know he's going to make me look at him anyways.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see him walk forward for a few seconds and then sit down onto the bed, his back away from me. The air becomes a bit cold and I shiver.

His hands grab my shoulders and he turns me around. Appalled, I suck in my breath and stare at him with fear.

"Just because we live in the same room doesn't mean you can seduce me. I'm not going to fall in love with you, Soojung. There's someone else I have in my heart, and I'm almost sure it's not you," his voice turns cold exactly the way the nurses and doctors described it on the first day I arrived here.

I shove his arms out of the way and climb out of the bed.

"I didn't do it."

He scoffs and sets the condiments onto the table beside his bed.

"Then who did? Do you think I'm dumb?"

Anger builds up inside me as he just continues to glare at me like a slave, like a wench that just used him. What happened to the Jongin who was scared and too kind to compare with others? Him changing to a beast is too incomprehensible for me.

"Who did it, I asked."

"Not me, but me," is the only thing I answer and then I turn around, tears dropping onto the ground. If he's going to continue like this, he won't even understand what I mean if I even explained anyways.

And then I burst.

"I don't know what is happening to me, but I know that something's happening," I turn around and let myself cry in front of him.

"There's someone inside of me, Jongin. That person decided to just take over me and that's what you saw last night, do you understand? Why are you even doing this to me? Did you forget our promise?"

I lastly say in a whisper so soft that it might sound like I'm not saying anything at all, "The promise of getting things figured out together?"

Jongin's face stiffens as if his eyes burn and then it softens.

"It's happening to you, too?" he whispers and wipes his eyes with his sleeve. "Do you feel as if your old self is trying to return, as well?"

I blink and a few tears fall out of my eyes onto his sheets, staining the bed. My chest begins to hurt and I feel like I'm suffocating in a chamber of no air, and I begin to gasp for air. The sockets of my knees liquify and I fall onto the ground, grabbing onto the sheets to help me.

Jongin yells my name and grabs my arms, but it's too late. It has already started.

"Just be happy with me... for now." He answers and plants a kiss on my forehead.

I grab my head and try to scream, but nothing comes out. The world around me turns into a spinning one with everything in a giant mess. Jongin screams a few sentences at me and then calls for the nurses to come, but I barely understand anything when more of the scenes come.

"I can't love you anymore. You cannot love me anymore, Soojung."

My chest tightens and there's no air left.

"Please trust me, Soo— Krystal."

I scream and fall into the ground in a ball, crying as my body tenses up very tightly and then everything just goes.

I'm fine again.

The nurses are too late.

The person has left me again, more frightened than ever.

//

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