Forsaking Lilly

Chapter Four

When I couldn't stand to hear my Mother's happiness anymore, I grabbed my duffle bag and left to go and shower. Of course, I excused myself away from our company before I did so. Ms. Lynette and my mother didn't seem to notice, but Cooper looked as if he was on the verge of begging me to stay.

I turned down the hall, and made a beeline to the bathroom. As soon as the bathroom door shut behind me, I was practically tearing of my clothes and climbing into the shower. I turned the hot water all the way up and sighed happily at the sting of it. The water seemed to take away every problem that I had. Well..momentarily, because after I was suds up and I rinsed and dried off the grief came back.

I picked my duffle bag off the floor by the door and placed it on the sink. Trying to distract myself, I picked a t-shirt and a pair of jeans out of the bag. I dressed, straightened my hair , and exited the bathroom. I came out to noisy laughter, and it was hard to believe that it came from only two women. I shook my head, if they didn't notice I'd came out of the bathroom then I wouldn't rejoin them. I  then made my way to my room feeling somehow worse than I had before my shower. This, of course, messed up my shower philosophy: Hot water = Peace and Tranquility.

I pushed open my room door and closed it. Since I was little, my room had always been my sanctuary. I was never the type of kid who wanted to go outside, play and get dirty. Often, I would go and climb up in my bed, find a good picture book or two and read it over and over. And when I was able to read chapter books, oh man! I could disappear in the pages for hours.Maybe a good book was what I needed.

I bent down where I had dropped my duffel and began rummaging around in it for a while. Inside, I found a paperback mystery and instantly began to look forward into devouring it. I remembered my mother's idea about reading in our backyard. I could almost feel the sensation of wind swirling around me, and I instantly began the walk to the french doors.Now, pulling the damn doors open was the tricky part but I felt rewarded when I finally did so.

As soon as I had taken two steps out the door, I began to mentally praise myself for making this decision. It was nice and cool out , and it was as if the birds chirped pleasantly from some invisible location. There was a soft gentle roaring from the trees swaying in the wind, and I couldn't  help but drink in all the fresh air. Yes, this would indeed be a good reading environment.

I began walking across the grass to the iron lawn chairs that I had seen earlier and sat down in one facing the woods. Luckily, the seats were cushioned and it wouldn't hurt me to sit for hours. Not wanting to waste any time, I relaxed in the chair and began reading my book. At first, it was kind of hard to but I slowly got into it. I made it a few chapters, before my mind began to wonder.

I thought about our old home again, and then I thought about my father. Would he really have wanted us to move? And why move so far? I mean, couldn't we just moved to another city? Why the whole state? Finding that I wasn't going to be able to read, I placed my book down on the ground and stood up from the chair. Maybe a good walk would help to calm me down. I looked at the woods and had a bad Idea. Maybe I could go walking through there, I mean if it was safe enough for Ms.Lynette to walk through then I would be fine. Set in my ways, I headed for the tree line.

The lush grass stopped abruptly, about a foot away from the wood's edge, and became dirt. Luckily, there was a path that lead through the woods, so this would be an easy stroll. I'm not going to lie, I was a little disappointed about it being so easy. If the path was more difficult, I wouldn't have been so focused on my own thoughts. But since it was easy...well, I'd be dealing with a lot of thinking.

Stepping into trees was like that moment when you first jump in the pool, it was a sudden rush but I was just happy to get it over with. Each step I took was relaxing,and being alone was never better.  I tried closing my eyes while I walked, but after tripping over a root, I thought the better of it. Note to self: clumsy people should never walk through woods with their eyes closed.I began laughing then, breaking the everlasting silence of the woods.As soon as I heard it,though, I stopped.

I didn't know where I had gotten the strength to laugh, especially out in the open like this. I had stopped as I became engrossed in my own thoughts. I took the time to really register how I was feeling. I mean, I had never thought to actually consider how I felt at this point. Maybe I was somewhere between devastated, and lost. My shoulders drooped with a sigh as I turned and began walking back toward the house, my walk could just wait until I was feeling better.

Walking back to the tree-line seemed to take longer than it had coming in. The path seemed to hold more thrown over tree trunks and  un-tamable tangles of roots. How had I picked my way through here? I made my over the large trunks slowly and carefully, trying not to get my jeans snagged on the rough bark. After about fifteen minutes, I found the tree line. I strode for it eagerly, ready to rest. But, when I took the first step out of the woods, something caught my foot.

Moss covered my sneaker in a very strange way, and when I tugged my foot forward it was like the moss tugged back. Sighing, I bent over and brushed the moss off of my shoe. I wouldn't be coming back to these woods if I couldn't get back out.