No Wings To Fly

Chapter Seventeen

I rushed to Sam's room. 

"Sam!"

She sat up straight, eyes wide. "Jay?"

"I- I can't stand this anymore. I can't." I was out of breath and probably looked ridiculous. "I'm sorry, Sam. I didn't know what I was saying..."

"It's okay. Really." She gave me a half smile.

"No... far from it. I shouldn't have said those things. I don't know what it is like to live like you do. Maybe denying its seriousness is how you cope with it all. I don't really know what I am saying... All I do know is that I can't stand being upset at you. I-I..."

"Its alright, Jay. I forgive you..."She swallowed loudly and I sat down on her bed. "I'm so sorry I get so mean sometimes. I'm just... I don't want to screw anything up. I mess up everything I get my hands on. Heck, even my own life. I couldn't do the same to you, Jay. I couldn't." Sam's eyes teared up.

I grabbed her hand and our eyes met. 

"I- I want to tell you something Samantha." 

She squeezed my hand. "I want to tell you what I told you while you were sleeping. Okay, Sam?"

"Okay, Jay."

I paused here to gather all the courage I had left in me. My knees shook, my eyes welled up with tears, and my heart felt like it would beat right out of my very chest. "You are beautiful."

Here, she gasped. "You have beautiful eyes, a beautiful smile... everything about you..."

"And, Sam. I should've told you this a long time ago. I felt it from the very first time I saw you. I can't eat. I definitely can't sleep. I can't get your beautiful face from my mind. It pains me every time I see you sad or hurt. And I can't stop thinking one thing..."

Her face was radiant now. Her smile was huge. Her eyes twinkled. She looked as if she had forgotten everything, forgotten the sickness she carried that was slowly killing her. She forgot the world. As did I. 

"Sam, I like you. "

She laughed. It was music to my ears. "You already told me that!"

"No, Sam. I like you." 

It took a moment for those words to finally sink in. "I like you more than just a friend. I like you, Sam. I have a crush on you. I have from the start."

She stopped for a moment. Then, very slowly, she picked up my hand. Her eyes studied mine. Sam pulled my hand closer yet, and placed it on her chest. I could feel her heartbeat beneath my fingertips. A shiver ran up my spine. Beautiful.

"And I like you too, Jay. My heart is yours, for as long as it will last, and then some." Her voice wavered in the air. "I like you too."

My heart sunk a little at those words. For as long as it will last...

"Miss Samantha Jayne White, would you like to go on a date with me?"

Her smile was immediate, reassuring. "Yes. Of course."

We leaned forward slowly and pressed our foreheads together. Both of us were broken. Both of us were imperfect. But, together, we just... fit. 

Our hands were still entwined with each-other and there was no way I would let go. Not ever. Not for the world.