Ever Enough (Girlxgirl)

CHAPTER 3

Over the next two days, I was under Ruby's intense glare and Mia's interested gaze. She drilled me with questions. She really was trying to get answers.

"No Mia. I really haven't taken estrogen pills." I answered her most rediculous question yet. She sighed and piled food onto our trays. She insisted that I was 'too damn skinny' to not be eating anything. But honestly, I think she did it so that once she was done with her food, she could eat mine. And I didn't complain as long as she kept wearing low rise shirts. It didn't matter to me.

"I'm so not saying that. I'm just saying there has to be a way to get rid of that thing." I laughed. She was just as disgusted by the penis I trended as I was. And I was greatful. At least she liked me. "It's called reconstructive surgery and a lot of doctor attention. And you have to have parent consent." She frowned and booed as we sat at a table. It was in the center of the room, and while it made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up, it didn't seem to bother her that eyes were pinned to us.

I watched her eat a fry and then wipe her hand on her jeans. Such a slob. Such a cutie. I shoved a napkin at her. "Use your table manners, hun." She smiled and rolled her eyes. "I'm just trying to help you. I mean, it's not fucking rocket science to understand your need to have boobs and a vagina. A little weird and out there, yeah, but when its done, it will be beautiful." I smiled.

"Thanks for that. It's good to know you understand me at least." She nodded. "Duh. Dude, understanding is my middle name." She then processed to fold her pizza in half and stuff half of it in her mouth after drenching it in ranch. "Are you sure it's not sloppy?"

She errupted in laughter, and I busied myself with staring at her laugh and the way her dimples make her look all the more adorable. She was beautiful. Every part of her. "You are so fucking funny!" She weezed out, resting her hand on my knee. I jumped a little and looked at her hand. It was firm on my knee, and I was puddy in her hands. Just like that. Fucking gone. Amazing.

When she stopped laughing, she changed the subject to a girl she disliked in her math class. And I couldn't have been happier. She had a way of talking that competely mesmerized me. And that hand hadn't left my knee yet. If anything, it moved a little more up my thigh.  

*** 

I was called out of school early. And at first I was mad about it. Why the hell would my parents even think about interrupting my education? Then I saw my brother's Mustang at the curb and a huge smile formed on my lips and I could barely contain my happiness as I ignored the attendance lady and ran out of the office and out of the school, bounding down the stairs, and before he could even close his door after he got out, I jumped into his arms. "Travis!" I yelled. His arms were wrapped around me tightly. "Hi!" He said, grunting, setting me on the ground. "Why are you back so early?" I asked. He looked in the back seat sheepishly. "We're fighting. He didn't want to be around his family while we were fighting."

The car door opened, and Ethan, as blind as ever shouted; "Fucking liar! All I was trying to do was tell my family about you and you had to get pissed about my friend? We hadn't seen each other in years. And automatically you think somethings going on between us?" Travis smiled at me before turning towards the car. "You're interrupting my conversation, darling." Travis muttered. Ethan slammed the door. "Oh the joys of being in a relationship. Speaking of, hows yours?"

Oh no. Shit. The tears were beginning again. And there was no stopping Ruby tears. Ruby tears fell freely. No matter how many times you blinked and bit your lip and pinched the bridge of your nose. Those fuckers needed out. And as soon as the first escaped, the others soon followed. Travis was panicking, if course. "What did I say wrong?" He asked, pulling me into a tight hug that I would have returned if I wasn't so upset. I mumbled incoherent sentences into his chest, and even I couldn't understand them, so I stopped and just cried.

"Okay, let's get you in the car. We can talk this over at my apartment." He led me around the car to the back seat. His car was a little run down, as the passenger seat was missing. No one knew where it was. He woke up one day and someone had busted his window and his CDs and passenger seat was gone. It was quite laughable.

I slid into the seat, eager to stop embaressing myself. At least Ethan couldn't see my makeup smearing and running down my face. I should invest in waterproof makeup considering how much tears I shed per week.

Ethans hand somehow found mine on the seat and he squeezed it. "Whatever it is, it'll get better." That only made a whimper escape me and Travis looked back at Ethan and glared even thouh he couldn't see him. "Console her!" He shouted. Ethan jumped but started moving his hand to my head and patted me like a dog. "There, there. Poor child." I couldn't stop from laughing. And Travis smirked at me through the rear view mirror. I wound my arms around Ethans waist and hugged him smiling. "I love you guys. Please stop fighting." Ethans arms found there way around me.

No one said anything else until we got there. Travis unbuckled his lover and I watched with a smile on my face as he wrapped his arm around his waist and took his hand and started whispering things in his ear. I bet it was the number of steps until they hit the sidewalk. He was always taking care of his blind partner. And if that wasn't love, I guest we were all screwed.

When he got in Travis set Ethan on the couch and told me to sit as well. When I did he looked at me expectantly, and even Ethan sent impatient looks in my direction. I sighed. "Ruby broke up with me," my voice was quiet and raw from crying. Shit. I hated being weak. I looked up at Travis, and he was trying to mask his anger but he failed terribly. "Calm down, Travy. It happens all the time..." my voice betrayed me. It shook and broke and before I knew it, the tears found their way to my cheeks. "I'm okay," I muttered, wiping the tears from my cheeks, probably smearing my makeup even more.

"Why?" Ethan asked. I whimpered.

Oh, this was pathetic.

"I told her the truth. I told her im a... b-boy." The sobs came then. Not needing to be asked this time Ethan hugged me to him and Travis came and hugged me also. I was in a hug sandwhich, I couldn't find anything enjoyable about it, even though I loved hugs. Nothing.

"She doesn't know what shes missing," Travis muttered into my hair. "Yes she does. She's missing me. The boy who lied about his gender all because he wants to--pathetically--become a girl but doesn't even have a vagina." This all came from nowhere. From my heart, but nowhere, in reality.

Travis pulled away and tugged me out of his boyfriends grasp, his hands on my shoulders. "Casey don't ever think about repeating that ever again. You are neither pathetic nor a fucking boy. She's a fucking twat for not seeing how fucking wonderful you are. She'll regret ever breaking up with you. There are plenty of other girls out there, Case. Don't get stuck on this one girl." I nodded meekly. I couldn't do much else. And I refused to tell him that she told me to kill myself. She apologized, right? She was sorry. Even if I took her advice and tried to. I'd never tell him. I couldn't. He'd go to prison for killing a teenager.

For the rest of the afternoon, we watched movies and Travis and Ethan cuddled and whispered sweet nothings to each other absentmindedly making my heart hurt. Whatever they were fighting about seemed forgotten for the moment and I was glad. At least they could be happy with each other.

When Travis brought me home we hugged and stuff and even though I felt a lot better than before, I felt empty when he left. Knowing my mother would be fusing over Henry and my dad would be in his office working and he wouldn't ask how my day at school was at the dinner table, he'd just shovel food into his overworked mouth and stare at his phone screen reading emails until it was an exceptable time to excuse himself from the dinner table, forgoing dessert and I would be left picking at the plate of perfect food my mother had made trying not to grimace as she 'here comes the choo-choo-trained' food into my four year old brothers mouth even though he could hold a fork with ease.

I'd get up and rinse my dish in the sink and sneak up the stairs to my room, changing into PJs and brushing my teeth, taking my sleeping pill eagerly and slipping into my pink bed, falling asleep without even looking at my poor homework. Granted, I'd be rushing to do it in the morning.