State of Grace (Complete)

Challenges and Changes

Ch 45

EIGHTEEN—UNIVERSITY

Orientation is kind of scary. There are a ton of people in the arts program, which English falls under, and I don't attend too many of the activities. I mean, I'm living at home anyway, so the crazy stuff that happens late at night isn't really anything I'll get involved with. I do meet a few people in my program, though, so that's pretty nice. Some of my courses have all the books online, but for a few of my literature courses, I prefer the feel of the books in my hand, so I have to go to the campus bookstore. I haven't been here since that 'date' with Max, but I do love it, so I wander the aisles taking my time to find what I need.

"Grace," I hear my name and the voice is unmistakeable. I turn, and Ian is standing with a girl, someone with long beautiful multi-coloured hair, who looks like she's definitely in fine arts. Her clothes are flowy and light, and she just looks like a stereotypical artist. Ian has a bit of a tan, his hair is longer than he normally keeps it, but it looks good—rumpled, like he's just rolled out of bed—with his clothes hanging comfortably over his broad shoulders. His fingers are stained with ink and entwined in hers. They look like they fit together and I try my hardest to keep my face calm.

"Hi Ian, how are you?" I smile, open and bright.

"Good, doing well." His smile doesn't meet his eyes. "You?"

"I'm fine, just looking for a few books," I gesture to my basket.

"Mom said you were taking writing," Ian offers.

"Yeah, thank you for my present."

"It was nothing," he says, and the conversation stalls. It's awkward for a second because I can tell Ian's not sure what to say next, so I turn to the girl and introduce myself.

"Hi, I'm Grace, Ian's next-door neighbour," I offer her my hand.

"Aria, I'm in Ian's program." and she shakes it, and gives me a sickeningly sweet false smile.

"Nice to meet you," I respond. She doesn't return the platitude.

I turn back to Ian, "I hear you've moved out, so I guess former neighbour is more correct."

"Yep I got a place off campus this year. I have a few jobs to help cover it, but we're making it work." We? Wow, he really has moved on. I try not to let my shock register on my face.

"Yeah, the apartment's great," Aria offers, confirming my assumption, and I need to leave before I get sick.

"Oh, well, it was great to meet you, but I really need to get in line so I'm not late for work," I offer. I can't help myself as I walk by. I reach out and squeeze Ian's arm, just for a second, just to see if I can. It's like a shock goes through me, and not in a bad way, which is even more devastating.

"See you around, Gail." Aria calls behind me as I walk away. I really hope Ian sees some redeeming qualities in her because I can't find any, but it's not my job to like her. He's moved on, just like I wanted him to.

It's funny, all through high school, our teachers kept telling us how different things are in university, and they made it sound harder. Maybe it is harder for people who have to figure out how to live away from home, but for the most part, I find my first term easier. Even though I have five classes, they are only three hours a week for each, and mostly the work consists of reading. Exams are a bit scary though. We have mid-terms and it's odd to have so much of my mark totally based on one test. In a few of my smaller classes I join study groups and it's helpful to talk about the course material with other people. I see my dad around campus sometimes, but it's funny, it's like he can't quite have his two worlds meet, so mostly he pretends that he doesn't see me. He is popular with the students though, some of the people in my study group have him for their contemporary lit course and say his lectures are great. His class isn't mandatory, so I am not going to take it, I don't think I could.