Sometimes things are hard [personal Journal]

It takes time to change

Things cool down after awhile. That's the great thing about time, it heals. Recently I've been going through some internal/emotional crap, but I'm keeping a smile on my face.

I feel like my old self to be honest. It's like my middle school years all over again. In middle school I had a crush on this boy, and he was really cute, but like most of my crushes he was straight and taken. After awhile he found out I was gay, not too mention there was a rumor going around I like him. He asked me about it, and I told him. He was completely fine with it.

I guess he's the one who really made feel comfortable with my sexuality. In the end, we didn't get together, but that's ok because me and him became ok friends.

The reason I say "ok" is because back then I was ALWAYS doing things by myself. I never hung out with anyone outside school, and that's how it's been for years. This is the old me, and it's how I've always been.

For awhile now I've been thinking about myself and how I have and haven't changed over the years. I'm still fat, still ugly, still lazy AF, still weird. But there are ways I have changed: I'm smarter, taller, I have more friends, I'm comfortable with myself, and I'm happy. I won't say "happier" because I was happy back, and I'm still happy now.

I guess that's all I have to say for now, thank you for reading.