Evil Heart Trusts

Chapter 4

 My childhood was so bright. I only had one friend, but that was all I wanted. Now, I have Kalli, and I couldn't ask for better, but his name constantly ring in my mind every day. I remember screaming his name endlessly in the dark as he left me to suffer as a prisoner of pain as he ran through the gates with no regret leaving me, not at all worried about his betrayal. But I forgive him..

 I just hope he could forgive me.

 I shook my head as I tried to rid the past out of mind once again. "I need to stop this!" I told myself with a slight chuckle, thinking about how many times I've had to tell that to myself day by day. I sat up right in my comfortable bed. I looked at my black alarm clock that read nine o'clock, A.M. I sighed and got up. I heard a knock on the door.

 "Great.." I whispered to myself, knowing who it was. I tip-toed to the door. I gripped the handle, regrettably, and opened the door slowly.

 Beth, the stealer.

 "H-Hey.." I whispered, stammering in fear of what she wanted now. Her straight brown hair falling perfectly on her shoulders. Her pale skin. Her flawless hazel eyes. She busted through my door. She didn't even say 'hi', but I guess I can expect that by now..

 She looked around my room. It was awkward silence for a few minutes, but it felt like days, weeks, months, years, with every slipping second.

 "Wallet?" she finally said, smacking on her gum, as she turned around to stare me in the eyes, making my eyes sting with tears. I pointed to my small, brown, leather wallet laying on my desk top next to my bed. She walked over to my desk and snatched the wallet. She unzipped a zipper.

*zip*

 She looked around in my wallet. I saw her grab a $20 dollar bill out my wallet. "Can-Can I ask what-what for?" I asked, nervously, blocking my face, daring to think she might even hit me. "What, I ain't got money, you got money, what'ya expect?!" she suddenly yelled as she stormed out my dorm with the money clenched in her fist. I sighed a sigh of unbelievable relief as she slammed the door shut. "Don't cry." I reminded myself aloud. I promised myself I would never cry again, and so far, I've been doing ok with keeping that up. I bit my lip to fight any thought of sadness. I suddenly felt a wave of.. regret.

 Thoughts of the past flooded back. "No, this isn't me!" I said aloud, realizing what the heck is going on. "Sar, quit it!!" I exclaimed. But I couldn't even help it. The regret was too much. His name ring in my head. *Flashback*.

  "ELLEN, I SWEAR, GET OUT OF HERE!!!" he shouted so loud, like never before. "I REFUSE TO LEAVE YOU!!" I swore. I was pinned to the ground, helpless. He was paralyzed, and couldn't even struggle to move. "ELLEN, JUST FIGHT IT, YOU KNOW I CAN'T!!" he begged. "I CAN'T LEAVE WITHOUT YOU!!" I sobbed, with no control of the flooding of tears. We heard cold laughter fill the room. "I'm trying to help you, Ellen!" a hard voice said. I sobbed out loud. My head felt like it would explode, just like a bomb, any second. I suddenly felt a flash of burning air. Like lava. Sar had entered my mind, and a freezing cold wind blew through for just a millisecond. The gates quickly opened up. I felt the gravitational pull of mine to the ground stop. He was released from his paralysis. We stared into each other's eyes confused, terrified. He looked back and forth between my eyes and the open-wide gates. "What?" I thought to myself. He ran through the open gates at full speed. I suddenly felt a shatter.

 My heart..

 I could only shout his name. The TRAITOR.

"MATTHIAS!!!" I shouted profusely. "MATTHIAS!!!" I shouted. "MATTHIAS!!!" I sobbed. I screamed and shouted his name endlessly into the darkness. "MATTHIAS!!!"

 "I tried to help you.." I heard someone say in my mind. I tried and tried to stop my sobbing. "I tried to warn you of that traitor, but you just wouldn't listen. You were just madly in LOVE." the voice said. "Now," Sar said as he showed his physical self to me for the first time. His dark brown hair, his crystal brown eyes, his pale-ish skin. "Love betrayed you." he stated. I couldn't even bear the thought of feeling anything at the moment. "I promise.. I'll never cry again.. so Matthias won't get to me.." I whispered to myself, alone in the cold..

  That was the last time I ever saw him..

 For a while.

 *reality*

"NO!!" I screamed. "I can't!!" I shouted. "I just can't!!" Sar didn't come out. I held in the tears so well, it was painful. I longed to cry, but I just couldn't let go. I threw myself on my bed. I screamed into my dark blue pillow. I screamed profusely. Someone burst through the door. I turned my head immediately to look who entered my dorm. Kalli was running to me. "Ellen, what happened?!" she yelled as she threw herself next to me. I threw my arms around her and squeezed her close. "I CAN'T!!" I shouted, wanting to give up on my promise. Wanting to just let go, but knowing I absolutely just can't. "Can't what?!" Kalli yelled as she comforted me, petting my head. I screamed out loud, feeling my face burn like fire, on the brink of tears. She pulled me even closer to her. She laid down on my messed up bed. She pulled me to lay next to her. She continued petting me, helping me to calm down. Two best friends just laying down.