Falling Walls (III)

Chapter 19

"I'm turning this place into a mess." Clothes scattered all over the floor, wine splattered down the windows, the floor and rug, hand prints on the earlier spotless shiny window. No kids to blame.
In only pajama bottoms Tom soaked the wine with paper towels off the floor while I wiped the splashes off the window. 
"You bring life in here," Tom laughed. "It's probably the most action this place has ever seen."
"I'll need window cleaner to clean this all up. Any idea where it's being kept?" Tom's smile got wider. He had no clue. 
"Leave it. The cleaner will do it. I like to keep these hand prints for a bit longer. I think they look great." With raised brows I just prepared to wipe away those prints, when Tom's hands circled around my wrists. "I was serious. Leave them." A kiss landed on each of them after he removed the paper towels from my hand.

~~~   ~~~   ~~~

The following morning we slept in and after a lazy breakfast in bed, we discussed what we should do on this Easter Monday. There was nothing I had in mind. I just wanted to spend time with Tom. That was all that mattered.

"Show me Hamburg," I suggested, pointing out the window. We were both standing in the open plan kitchen with a hot mug of coffee in our hands.

"Which part?" Tom asked, turning to look at the city at our feet. "Hamburg is big. Not as big as Sydney, but definitely too big to do in one day."

"Show me your favourite places." I wanted him to enjoy this day just as much as I would and I also saw it as an opportunity to learn more about him, understand him. Tom smirked, giving me the feeling that he already had something in mind.

We asked Jan to join us but it turned out that he already had plans. Of course he did. Tom wasn't even meant to be in Germany. Jan was expecting some friends from his bike riding club. I must have looked just as astonished as I felt about that information but unimpressed and cheerful as ever, he explained that he had a special bike which he can use with his hands, like the one's being used at the Paralympics. 

I really liked Jan. Considering his past, he must have been through about the same as Tom, yet he seemed to live his life with so much less worries. Of course, that could be just a false picture I was getting and possibly due to the nature of responsibility they each carried. Tom felt guilty for Jan's injuries and even though he always pointed out that until now he lived his life without personal responsibilities, he's always been dedicated to Jan.

Tom and I spent a magical day in Hamburg. He had intended to take me to the Art Gallery, but because it was a holiday it was closed. His next idea was the Chocoversum, Hamburg's chocolate museum, but then he thought the kids would enjoy that as well. So we postponed both activities and in the end drove out to Planten un Blomen, a magical park in the middle of Hamburg with colourful flower beds and water features. Unfortunately, so Tom informed me, the famous water-light concerts wouldn't start for another few weeks, as the summer season approached. 

The park also harboured the Old Botanical Garden and we strolled by beautiful sunshine through the scented walkways, over romantic bridges and had a relaxing picnic containing of bread rolls from the park café. Leaving the park just after lunch, we passed one of the many city bike hire stations. As it was such a beautiful spring day, we hired two of the red bikes and rode the six or so kilometres to Oevelgoenner Beach, where we waded through the water and enjoyed the fresh, salty air. Tom had never used the bikes before, but raved about the amazing system which allowed people to use the free bikes for short periods or longer for a small charge, about the ecological and health benefits and began planning for a possible introduction of a similar system in Sydney. His enthusiasm was contagious. At some point during this day I fell madly in love with Hamburg. But even more than watching Hamburg's scenery, I enjoyed Tom's passion for the simple things in this city. And that's when I reminded myself that yes, Tom's lifestyle had been different to mine, but deep inside we enjoyed the same things, and luckily, they were not out of this world.

Back at home, Tom needed to attend to some phone calls. He grabbed a few folders from the bedroom desk, then disappeared into his study. I was certain he did this only to give me the opportunity to go to sleep, but I couldn't sleep just yet. Not without Tom by my side. Even though it was already past ten, I called my mum's phone and lucky enough got to talk to Sam and Emma, who were both looking forward to catching up with us in two days. 

Then I gave Dave a call and finally tried to call Hannah. I hadn't spoken to her at all since leaving Sydney over a week earlier. I was glad we'd put our dispute aside before I left and I had accepted her apology. She'd tried to call me a few times. I wasn't deliberately avoiding her but I also hadn't had the strength to call her back. Now was time, but the call went straight to voice mail. I left a short message before taking a shower and getting ready for bed.

I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep for a while. Not unless Tom would come to bed soon. So I took my handbag and got my book out. 

In all honesty Eva opened up about her feelings when finding out she was expecting a child. She was shocked at first, then became increasingly scared. I admired her for her honesty and could so well relate to her feeling. I myself had been shocked when I found out I was pregnant with the twins. Often had I thought about how it might have been better to wait until I was securely in employment and known my partner for longer. Yet, having had those kids was the best that ever happened to me. I blinked a few tears away before I could continue reading.

Only two days after revealing her pregnancy to Johan over the phone, a member of the Stasi interrogated her about her relationship to the rowing star. That was the time, she explained, that she became convinced that they were being spied on. From then on, she felt like walking on raw eggs, always careful not to break one. Important matters between them were only discussed in public parks or by whispering into each other's ears while turning up the radio. It was no life she wanted for her herself, let alone her child.

Eva and Johan got married in an unspectacular ceremony shortly after and within weeks Johan left for England while Eva focused on advancing her studies. The pressure was on Johan to succeed at the championships as it would secure their future. Two days before his first race though, the drama began unfolding. Two of his team colleagues took their chance to flee. They just left the Olympic Village and did not return. Johan was good friends with one of them and came under suspicion. So did Eva who had planned to visit her brother near the border to West Germany the following week. The Stasi picked her up from the library where she had been studying and held her for three days to questions her. Johan had been unable to contact her, couldn't sleep, but thanks to the drugs the state unknowingly administered him, managed two silver and a bronze medal in the relay.

I shrug and automatically shut the book when Tom entered.

"You don't need to stop reading."

"I'm not. You just scared me."

"Sorry," he apologised, but his seductive glance told me he didn't mean it.

My dreams that night were filled with pictures of a pregnant and scared Eva, living in a prison state.