The Comeback

Chapter 4 - Vocation

Chapter 4 - Vocation

After the physiotherapy Cassidy asks me if I want to go outside for a while, to breathe some fresh air and I accept immediately. It’s still cold so we go for a coat for her and for me, and then she wheels me to the garden the hospital has. There are some other people around, walking slowly or sitting on some benches here and there.

“Wanna walk a bit?” She asks me standing next to my wheel chair.

The surgery was four weeks ago, when the accident happened and the wounds are basically completely healed, although my body is still trying to get used to being awake and in use again. Still, I have to be careful. I can’t go running and doing hard work, but walking is a good idea. It will probably help me to recover faster.

That’s why I reply with a simple, “sure.” Cassidy helps me to stand up and we leave the chair aside. She loops her arm round mine in case I need her support, but I try to do it all on my own. Sometimes my own body feels strange to me, like it’s not mine. Sometimes I feel like a part of me fights me, but I just assume it’s a consequence of being in coma for four weeks.

It’s actually really nice to have Cassidy next to me, walking step by step with me. Her contact gives me familiarity in a place I don’t really know. I’ve never been fond of hospitals, but it’s bearable when she’s around. I still don’t know why I feel like I know her, yet I know I’ve never seen her before until I opened my eyes a few days ago.

“So, on a scale from one to ten, how much do you wanna leave this place?” She asks me as we walk slowly. It’s really cold, but it’s not raining or snowing, so we’re good.

“Eleven,” I answer and she giggles. I’m sure she expected that answer.

“Everyone is always raring to leave, and I don’t blame them. Hospitals are not the happiest place, uh? But I like them,” she tells me, with her eyes always locked in front of us. I keep staring at her, paying attention to the way her hair bounces with very step and how the cold breeze moves her curls and she fights to put them back where they were first.

“You’re studying medical engineering, right?” I ask and she nods. “So you plan on spending loads of time in hospitals,” I venture and she nods again.

“I like hospitals for many reasons. The main one is that here everyone is fighting to make people better, to help them. Everyone wants to save lives. I’m not material for being a doctor because I just can’t handle the pressure of having a life directly in my hands, but I like the idea of developing the technology that will help them. Plus, hospitals are always clean,” she adds and smiles at me with her eyes closed for a second in one absolutely adorable gesture. A part of me stirs inside. “What about you?”

“I also think hospitals are clean,” I answer and she laughs, that melodious and lovely laughter of hers. I realise I’m growing really fond of her laughter.

“I didn’t mean that,” she tells me and I know, but I wanted her to laugh.

“Oh,” I pretend and she giggles again. “Well, I like planes. I’ve always liked them. I have a very decent collection back at home, and a few here at my dorm in Uni. Since I can remember I’ve wanted to build airplanes.”

“That’s cool,” she replies and I shrug.

I don’t have further motivation to do what I’m doing, like she does, I just like planes. However, she has really thought about her choices and why she is studying that, she is studying medical engineering because that’s her vocation. I feel like I’ve disappointed her somehow and I know she is thinking of something because she is looking at her feet and she doesn’t seem happy. Again, there’s this halo of sadness around her and I wish I knew what she’s thinking of.