ALEX

A CHANCE TO

Kit promised me that he'd never leave or hurt me but so much for that. The last thing I ever thought I'd find myself doing is knocking on Alex's door but after Kit's decision of calling a quits I find myself needing to be around someone. I need to talk to someone or else this loneliness will kill me.

Quickly I bow my head down the moment I hear the door before me unlock. I can't face Alex right now, I can't stare into those eyes that I've fallen in love with. He probably knew that I'd come crawling back to him because by the tone of his voice I could tell that he was not surprised by my visit.

"Come in," he grins without questioning the reason why I've decided to show up on short notice.

Slowly I step in following him silently. His house is the same way he's left it from the last time I ever saw him, you know, before his big disappearance.

"How are you feeling," I ask softly.

I am in no state to converse but I try. I owe him that much since I haven't really talked to him in a long time especially after discovering that he's suffering from amnesia.

Alex looks over his shoulder and shrugs. "I suppose I am feeling fine, how about you. You don't look too well there," he points out as he marches through his dinning room and into the kitchen.

Just great I look sickly in front of my ex, fantastic. "Had a sleepless night, but I am doing just fine," I answer as I pull out a chair to sit the moment I realize that Alex is pouring us a cup of coffee.

He knows exactly how to calm me down when I am in distress, I guess that he can see through my lies that I've been crying all night.

"Your favorite just how you like it or at least that's what I think," he hands me the coffee mug and from there I can smell the scoop of chocolate ice-cream and hot syrup fuming up my nostrils. Yeah, my Alex is still in there somewhere.

Alex pulls out a chair also and sits next to me. He must have been asleep from the bags I see resting underneath his eyes. His delightful brown hair now shorter than the norm but by the messy up-do he's got it soothes him well. His beard has grown feverishly on his face while behind that smile I can see in those eyes that he's concerned about me.

"I'm fine," I whisper knowing exactly what thoughts crossed his mind.

I know that he doesn't believe me, but instead of badgering me to speak Alex sits there and drinks his cup of coffee with me. He understands that at the moment I just need some company.

"Did I put too much syrup," he questions with a twinkle in his eyes.

I laugh softly the moment he points out to my chocolate syrup mustache.

"Not at all...not at all."

And with that we drink two more cups of coffee before finally discussing what's been bothering us. I can't believe it myself that I'm talking to Alex about Kit.

I never thought that I'd get a chance to talk to him the way that I did today. Like we were still lovers who never separated.

"You should call him," Alex suggests.

I doubt that Kit even wants to hear from me. The way he looked at me that at his workshop I'll never forget, it was with full disgust.

"I don't think that's a good idea," I answer honestly.

Alex sighs deeply.

"Do you love him," he asks.

My hearts stops for a second to that question. I've got no clue whatsoever how to answer him. Its a bit too personal and answering it in front of Alex will only make me upset because I don't think that I've ever told Alex that I loved him when we were together.

"You don't have to answer that," Alex bows his head. It must be hard for him to even sit here next to me.

I whisk a shy smile and stand to my feet.

"Thank-you for the coffee," I tell him as I make my way to the door.

Things between us are just getting awkward.

"Anytime." I hear behind me as I walk out.

God I miss him.....Alex, despite the fact that I've chosen someone else instead of him he still welcomes me with open arms.

What am I going to do...what am I going to do?