Tevun-Krus #29 - Punk Wars!

Smith & Jones

"What do you mean, we don't have an episode this month?" Jones asked. He was really rather irate and was making no effort at all to hide that fact.

"I dunno' what to tell you, Jonesy," Kris replied with a shrug of her shoulders that made her rather ample bosom jiggle somewhat. "That's what it says on the card, look."

"'Sorry, guys, but due to the nature of this issue and the fact that it deals with a vast number of sub-genres, there is nothing specific enough to warrant being part of the loop within which you currently find yourselves trapped. Therefore, The Management have reached the executive decision that we're not even going to bother trying to squeeze you in so take a break, enjoy a couple of complimentary cocktails and prepare yourselves for further adventures throughout the sub-genre-iverse. Kind regards. Love from The Management.'"

"Well that's an absolute crock of shit," said Smith, firmly. "And I don't even see a cocktail bar."

It was not only a cocktail bar or, indeed, a bar of any kind that Smith could not see for in fact he, Jones and Kris could not really see anything at all, other than the ornate side table upon which the note had formerly resided, each other and the note itself. Everything else was brilliantly white, as if they had just walked into a paint showroom following a particularly brutal, all-encompassing paint fight, but only with white paint...

Moving swiftly on...

Eventually, the intrepid trio located the bar and its promised cocktails advertised by way of chalk scrawl upon a blackboard.

The cocktail bar, much like the rest of wherever they were, was white, only it was a different white to the rest of the white.

Behind that bar, breaking almost as many glasses as he successfully managed to polish, was a very familiar face.

"H'ver, how the devil are you old chap?"

"I'm well, Smith," the wee robot replied. "Of course, I've been waiting here for you for months which is why I had to get this bar job. Rent doesn't pay for itself, especially with Boogaloo the Bingleboo cotching on one's couch!"

"Guess time moves differently here," said Kris, shrugging once again which, as you might have guessed, caused her jubblies to bounce a tad. "Months, though? I do hope we're not going to be here that long..."

"Now we're all here, I don't think we will be," H'ver replied. "And besides, a couple of days ago my sensors detected the presence of a missing power cube here, in this place. I've been attempting to locate it during my off time but have had no luck as yet, and Boogaloo is as useless as a very useless thing. All he does is laze around all day fingering his bottom!"

"Sounds like a typical Tuesday evening to me," Smith blurted out before he could stop himself.

"So what can I get you folks, anyway?" H'ver asked, slightly despondently. He really was not cut out for bar work.

"Can you do a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster?" Kris asked. She didn't shrug this time, much to the dismay of her male companions.

"I can do better than that," the mechanoid replied. "I can do three!"

Which was lucky, because there were three of them...

Once the drinks were placed upon the bar Kris knocked hers back immediately whilst both Smith and Jones stared at the contents of their respective glasses in abject terror, though they were about to brave the bubbling, fizzling, steaming liquid, when Kris suddenly started choking.

"Quick, Jones! Give her the kiss of life!"

"That's not for choking, Sir... For choking, you need to tickle her feet!"

"Fucking idiots..." H'ver sighed, and from his eye sockets he shot a couple of bots of supercharged electricity at the woman. Rather than kill her, as such a thing probably should have done, it caused her to cough up what she had been choking upon, which is a good thing.

"Oh look, it's the power cube," said Jones with a nod towards it, where it sat upon the bar, coated in an inordinate amount of saliva. "Mmmm, saliva... I'm just going for a..."

Exactly what Jones was going for, he never said and his companions never found out for at that very moment, they were enveloped in a thick, dark fog of impenetrable black light...