and a horse called Straton

Chapter 21

A/N
*sigh* sorry my updates are so slow, there's a lotta stuff going on at the moment (if you want to know, message me or whatever) and yeah. So I'll (probably) be slower.

*****

Caitlyn laid on Straton's back while he flicked his ears placidly, chewing on some hayed off grass. Her lungs hung on either side of his back while her arms were resting on her chest while she tried to braid the long grass. But the callouses on her hands prevented that from happening. It was another thing her and Luke used to do. Braid the grass, see who could make it the longest then chase each other with them, flicking the sharp braids at each other till they were bleeding and laughing.
Blood.
The small voice reminded and Caitlyn shuddered on Straton's back. She decided it would be a good idea to go and see the others, if she could find where it was. To be honest she wasn't entirely sure. Then she realised she was laying on a walking, eating GPS.

She swung around nimbly so she was sitting up on the bare gelding. "Go home," she told him, the words rolling off in aboriginal before she made a conscious decision. Straton immediately moved to a canter, covering the ground easily while she knotted her hands into his thick mane and kept her face buried in it to try hide the tears that were now steadily falling.

Nothing was as she expected, her home wasn't home anymore. Maybe a piece of paper said that was her address but it wasn't her home. Straton showed her that, home for him was with Nanna and the others. They were her people. The ones who had always been her family didn't understand anymore, they didn't get it.

They didn't know her.

Straton pushed a gallop but didn't shift to it, too much danger of a wombat burrow. At a canter he would recognise them. The speed pulled her hair back and contorted it into knots and dreadlocks. After what seemed like an eternity, she slowly sat up and the wind snapped her hair and stung her eyes. But she smiled, then laughed. Perhaps she wouldn't go back.

*****

Nanna shielded her eyes from the sun to see a duo riding towards them. A smile carved through her face. She knew that Lynn would come back, there was no denying it. Slowly others began to notice and large smiles spread through the mob like wild fire in summer.

Caitlyn got to them and Straton stopped. There was but a moment of silence before everything erupted and she ended up in the middle of an enormous hug with about fifty people. There wasn't a face that wasn't split by a smile. Straton was particularly excited, someone had brought some food for him and was giving it to him while he nudged them for more.

"We knew you'd come home, burnu," someone called in broken English but refused to use an English name with her. The name brought tears up that she quickly suppressed them. "I couldn't stay away. Them whities," she jokingly used their nickname. "No fun," she laughed along with everyone else.

After it all was said and done, the food eaten and the talks talked, Nanna pulled her in for another hug. Caitlyn didn't comment on the burn across her back, she was too happy to be back. "But you must go back soon, they'll be worried," it was only then that Caitlyn noticed how late it was. Evidently the mob was further away than she thought.
"I don't want to," she said quietly. This answer called for silence. Not even Arana, the baby, cried.

"But it's where you belong."

"Maybe I did once! But not anymore. They don't know me. They don't know what happened," Caitlyn whispered the last part, they knew what happened but no one else did. Being in a tight knit community, everyone had seen at least one of her nightmares.

"Burnu, they mightn't understand." Nanna's old eyes waved slightly. "But they do love you, and that won't change no matter what."

"But it might. And I'm," she looked away, "I'm not ready for that."

"But you can handle it. I know you can. It might be horrible, no, it will be horrible, but you must stay. You must show your strength. To yourself," Nanna reached out a gnarled finger and prodded her in the chest, nodding knowingly. "Now you and that horse better git back before people get worried again!"

*****

The whole way home, Nanna's words played on Caitlyn's mind, was she really strong enough?  Surely she couldn't be. It wasn't like she was anything special, she was just a cowgirl born onto a farm who got lost on the wrong night in the wrong place and is now only just surviving.

Straton snorting pulled her from the deep chasm of overthinking as they got back to the home paddock. Caitlyn swung off him and have him a pat, it was dark and the lights in the house were on meaning at least one person was up waiting for her.

The steps creaked beneath her bare feet, she'd abandoned her shoes after checking the calves. Boots were restrictive and painful to her hard feet. She took them slowly, not looking forward to the telling off she'd receive at the top.

"Kitty!  Thank god you're safe!" Ty said, barreling into her as soon as she stepped over the threshold. Her dad stood off behind him, trying to seem annoyed but failing.

"Don't use 'is name that way," old Ben chastised from the round table where he sat with his routine beer. Ty flashed him an apologetic smile.

"Sooo, I'm not in trouble?" Caitlyn said, blatantly confused.

"Well, sorta, we've been worried sick." Her dad finally spoke up.

"Why?  I've been out later before," she said indignantly with a frown creasing her face.

"And I was worried then as well."

"But why wait up now?"  Everyone else had fallen silent now, their eyes flicking between the two.

"Well. You. You were alone." The silence was straining quickly and could be likened to the moment before the starting gun fires.

Anger rolled off Caitlyn. "So I'm not good enough to be on my own?  Is that it?" Her words came out slowly and carefully, sending chills through everyone from the tension.

"No-"

"Then why are we having this conversation?"

She snapped, the words snapping the room in two as she stormed to her room, leaving all three men out of their seats wondering what happened.