Don't be Chicken (on hold)

Seventeen; The deadly bomb

I went to bed that night with shivering arms for the night air was fresh and crisp.  I had to admit, the blankets on my bed weren't enough.

I sat there shivering for while in the silence of my bed room when I noticed a particular sweatshirt still on the floor. And then I quickly remembered that night like it was yesterday, and in a way, it had only been a couple weeks since. I thought on it for a moment, should I?

And I did. I plucked the sweatshirt up from the floor and put it on, the warmth soon over took my body. I could smell him on the sweatshirt, he smelled nice - as weird and creepy as that may sound, but I don't care. I'll admit it, I had a big crush on Noah. But it was one of those silly crushes that nothing happens because of it. In a way - having his sweatshirt on created dreams that I would forever keep.

I fell asleep, with his smell comforting me until my eyes closed for the night.

                         •*•*•*•*•*•*•*•

I woke up the next morning completely exhausted. Mostly because I woke up at 3 in the morning from the dog and my blankets fell off as well. I wanted to fall asleep once more so I could sleep like a sloth, but I knew I had chores to do.

At the beginning I thought this summer would be relaxing, but in a way it was the complete opposite. Every night I went to bed tired and restless, it was weird and every morning I woke up exhausted. There was only one way to describe it; Farm work Sucked.

I got dressed in these lacy shorts I got from the store, and a blue tank top that matched rather well. I was pretty satisfied with my outfit so I trudged down the steps towards breakfast, also known as the love of my life.

Noah was sitting there as I walked down the stairs, and I guess I blushed when I saw the way he continued to smile at me. Thoughts of yesterday clouded my head, and my smile only widened at the memory. He grinned.

Breakfast slipped by really fast. Dusty looked a little bummed and I could only assume it was because her wish didn't come true last night.

Soon enough every one was gathering around the list of chores that would occupy today. Under my name was cleaning stalls again, and carrying hay to the barn. Unfortunately, Dusty had to help me with cleaning stalls and I can only imagine how miserable this will be.

                  •*•*•*•+•*

"Last night Noah was totally flirting with me" Dusty said, and at this point I realized she was only trying to make me jealous. I rolled my eyes at her summer dress she was wearing and her hair that she took the time to curl. Heck, in this heat how can she stand to wear her hair down?

My hair turns into a tumbleweed once the humidity appears, and I can only hope that might happen to Dusty.

                  "Oh really? Like what?" I asked her lip-glossed face. She smiled a large smile, but then it soon faltered. She seemed to be sad a bit, and content at the same time.

"Well, he complemented my hair and outfit." She said happily. She shoveled more poop into the wheelbarrow and let out a grunt. "Unfortunately I didn't sleep with him though, he never made a move. Do you think he's nervous to confront me?" She asked genuinely. Her comment made me want to laugh, did she really think that? 

                  "I'm not sure. maybe" I said, but I was only trying to pry more information out of her. "What kind of stuff does he do that could suggest that he likes you?" I asked with a shrug.

                         "Well, he's so kind and he treats me like I'm a princess. He's polite - he opens car doors and smiles. It's hard to explain, but if you were with us you would see it too" Dusty said calmly. My ears perked up at her sentence, and my worries started to grow slowly out of control.

And here I was being jealous again.

It didn't make sense, I thought Noah liked me too. But now I wasn't so sure. What if he didn't like Me or Dusty - maybe he was just being a respectful man and I should back up. It was impossible to tell and that's the part that drove me crazy.

                "Don't you have a boyfriend Karman?" Dusty asked abruptly with a curious look. At first I was a bit confused on why she asked, but then I remembered Carson. If anything Dusty knew about him from social media, I internally threw up at the thought of him.  But then I heard a noise coming from behind the barn and I quickly turned my head, hoping it was just the cat or something. I heard footsteps walking away briskly and I looked at Dusty to see if she noticed, she only smiled.

I hesitated at first, but I answered before she could assume anything else.

                 "No, I broke up with him before I came here. I never truly liked him anyway" I said with clenched teeth. Dusty gave a fake frown.

             "Aw, you guys were cute together" She said, her pretend sadness made me sick.

               "No we weren't, he was a jerk. He's too obsessed over me anyway. He claims that if I ever find another guy that he'll find a way to get me back or something. I'm glad that it's over" I said with no hesitation. Dusty gave me this smile that almost made me shiver.

                  "Well I'm glad that you're happy without him. But have you ever thought that maybe he's trying to protect you?" Dusty asked. Her eyes were in a thin stare and I couldn't help but cringe.

                "No way. Don't you know that boyfriends are suppose to give you space as well?" I asked. "No girl deserves to be bossed around like a object. We are human beings, not things" I said sternly. I don't know why I was so persistent, but I just wanted her to know. I didn't want her to settle for anything less than she deserved - no matter how rude she might be. People can change, and I believe Dusty could too if she really set her mind to it.

                "You're crazy Karman. It's obvious, the reason you and Carson didn't work out was because of you. You were the bomb in that relationship, and you always will be in any relationship you get into"

And I suppose, in a way - Dusty was right, I was the bomb.

You can't notice it now, and neither could I at the time - but parts of her statement was true.

I told her that she was wrong, I wasn't the bomb. Heck, how could I be? Carson was the fool. But, I was the one that called him and told him it was over - and I guess literally speaking - I was the bomb that stopped our relationship for the better. 

But then I realized something very important -

            A bomb only explodes when there's an action that finally blows the fuse.

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THANKS FOR READINg!!!!
Hope you enjoyed, although this chapter is rather short I can PROMISE you that the next one will be longer, hopefully I'll have that up soon! :)

Thanks for reading and I hope you all have a nice week! :)