there are no words to describe how
scared i am of losing you.
this idea of things never
being the same again has
drilled its way into my
mind, and my head hurts because
all these thoughts are tumbling
around in my head and its hard
not to think about it.
my heart stops when i see you—
for two different reasons, whether
it be because its you, or because
its you— and those reasons are
awfully similar, yet so different.
because its you, the girl
that i love. but its you,
the girl im afraid of.
and i dont know if i should run
away or ask you to hold me closer,
because i feel like im falling apart,
but would you be willing to
hold me together?
maybe its unfair, to
tell you how i want to
leave and never look back,
but as much as that idea probes
my mind, it physically hurts to
think about ending things
for good.
because im in love with you,
and it hurts so much, and i feel
like im slowly going insane—
youre the only person who
has any idea how to make
me feel okay—even if you
are the one who makes
me feel insane.
__
im only back temporarily
