Rejected

7

Recap:

" Please, don't make me do that again" I begged in a whisper. My heart began to beat faster just at the thought of it.

   " No," he whispered. He pulled my head to the crook of his neck. " Not again" he said in a whisper against the top of my head.

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      Alpha continued to hold me till I was calm. His large mitt stroked my hair in a fatherly way. My body trembled with the feelings of all these emotions from that memory of when I was fine and now. He held me till my mind had gotten full comprehension of where I was and when. I jumped as someone knocked on the door.

    " Who is it?" Alpha called out.

    " Me dad" I recognized as Christopher's voice. Alpha slowly picked me up as if I were made of glass. I shook at just the thought of seeing Christopher. He set me in one of the chairs that sat in front of his desk. Alpha walked to the door and opened it slightly.

    " What?" He growled out. I guess he was still mad at him for hurting me.

    " Why was that whore in my bed?" He asked mad.

    " One she's not a whore and if you call her one again I won't hesitate to punish you myself, two I put her there" alpha answered.

Christopher growled " Why? I don't like her, no one will, she's an embarrassment to be around. Haven't you seen the way the pack looks at her, she's worthless to us" he said in a deep voice.

   " Christopher!" His father said in disappointment.

   " Don't act like it's not true, her father was right in hurting her, she's the reason her mother died anyways. " He said crossing his arms.

     I looked at the floor. My chest hurt, my body shook with sadness as tears left my eyes. My cheeks felt hot and flustered. I got up and pushed past the two. I ran at full force through the pack house. I ran till I was outside. I didn't stop.

    I ran, and ran and ran. I didn't know where I was going. I just ran. I couldn't stop. My wolf whined in pain from hearing those words from her mate. But he wasn't our mate, he made that clear from the beginning. I started to recognize where I was and I ran to my place.

   When I got there I collapsed to my knees. I was breathing heavily. My lungs hurt from the effort I had put on the. I dug under the tree that sat just in front of it. I pulled out the baggie I left there. In the baggie laid my razors. I pushed up my sleeves.

   I looked at the bruised, burned and battered skin. I deserved this? I looked at my wrist seeing the long line of scars and cuts, some as new as yester some old enough to go back years. I deserved this, all this pain. All the abuse, all the insult and fist, all the cuts and burns. All the knives and belts. I deserved this. My heart thumped in my chest. I could feel my wolf's depression seeping through.

     " I'm sorry" I whispered. " I'm so sorry" I cried to her. She didn't answer. "You deserve better" I whispered.

     She cut the connection with me making my heart break. I was shaking with my sobs. I pushed the cool metal to my skin, watching as it sliced at the healing cuts. I pulled it all the way across my wrist making sure to connect it to the starting point. I don't know why I did, but the pain felt right. I didn't care if it got infected, or if I bled out. I welcomed any pain that was willing to come.