Nothing (A Harry Styles Fan Fic)

Chapter 11

I drove back to my house as quickly as I could hoping I wouldn't die from not being able to see clearly because of all the tears and mascara in my eyes. It's just didn't feel real. All those years of hating him for leaving me then getting him back and loving him only to lose him again to the same thing I lost him to the first time, fame.

I loved him more than anything and I wanted us to work. I wanted to hold him and go on dates and laugh with him for years and years to come but he couldn't even give me that for 6 months. Hell. He gave it to me for a month before showing me what it'd really be like.

I walked into my apartment throwing the bag on the floor sliding down the back of my door after closing it. I have no idea what I'm supposed to do. I called the first person I could think of to help me.

"Hello" I breathed out when I heard Tes answer on the other line

"I need you to come over. Like now. I need you" I said crying trying to catch my breath

"Hey hey. What's wrong? What happened?" I could hear the worry in her voice and her grabbing her keys to her car. I thanked God everyday knowing that I always would have her.

"Harry- I- we-" I couldn't even finish before losing it once again tugging on my scalp needing something to hold onto

"Hey it will be okay. I promise. Give me 5 minutes at most and I'll be there okay? Just 5 minutes."

"Please hurry" I whispered barely before hanging up not wanting anymore conversation. I just needed someone to hold me... I want Harry. But I can't have him. Thinking of that only made me cry harder and before I knew it, I jumped hearing a knock on the door.

I bit my cheek slowly getting up and opening the door before Tes swallowed me in a hug. I held onto her losing it and collapsing on the floor her following holding me close. I thought the first time he left me was the worst pain but no... No this was so much worse. This time I had him. I really really had him. He was mine. I could kiss him. I could tell him I loved him and he'd say it back. And I know he meant it... At least for a while. But now that's all gone. And damn it hurts so much worse than the first time.

I don't know how long I cried. Maybe minutes. Maybe hours. I don't know. All I know is that I literally cried myself to sleep right there on the kitchen floor with Tes holding me in place of Harry...

I woke up the next morning feeling like I got hit by a truck. My head hurt, my body hurt, I literally felt sick to my stomach and I shook Tes awake biting my lip.

"Hm? Hey, how are you feeling?" she mumbled waking up and sitting up some more pulling my hair back for me into a bun.

"I didn't think it was possible but even worse than yesterday" I whispered making her frown

"How about I take you to your bed then make you breakfast in bed." She smiled small trying to help

I just nodded lightly in response using her and the table to help myself up before going to my room getting wrapped up in my blanket.

Once I was all settled she kissed my head. She and I grew up together so we were closer than most sisters even are. She held me and I held her when we needed it and we also acted like each other's mother when we needed it and god I needed it right now.

"I'll be back soon okay? Watch some Netflix or YouTube for a bit." She said taking my phone

"Hey. What are you doing with that" I said sitting up a bit and bit my cheek wanting to look at photos of us when we were okay and happy but I should've known better hearing what she said next.

"You know I know you better than that. You would've put on some tv show to make me think you were watching it and gone and looked at photos only making it worse. Watch some videos and just get your mind off of it as much as you can. I'll be back soon with food" she sighed leaving and I hesitantly laid back down turning on Netflix clicking on some random series hoping to get my mind as far away from him as I could

After a while Tes came in with waffles and bacon and my favorite smoothie and also coffee and I couldn't help but smile small.

"Breakfast is served my lady" she said curtsying playfully and I laughed lightly

"Thank you. For everything" I whispered looking at her

She smiled looking back

"You don't have to thank me. But you do have to do something for me" she smirked and I instantly knew this wasn't gonna be good

"What..." I asked hesitantly

"I have a clubbing dress in that closet that is gonna make you look fine as hell and I'm doing your hair and makeup and we're going to the club." She smiled

"No. Uh uh. No way. I'm staying in and crying. I'm not-" she cut me off before I could finish.

"You are and you'll like it. We're going to the club, Getting drunk, and dancing our asses off until you can't even remember what day it is let alone what happened. Got it?" She smiled

I smiled small and looked at her

"Okay" I whispered

Maybe this could be good for me. Maybe it will get my mind off of him. I started to feel a bit better thinking about drinking and just having fun with Tes and some of my friends.

Let me just tell you... It was one hell of a night for me.