In Your Eyes // Steve Rogers

56

I dropped out of a portal from within the sky. Bright lights illuminated the remaining sky underneath me. I was in the future, in New York City, again. I was closer to home.

But home still remained farther than I could reach. First, surviving the imminent crash was necessary if I wanted to make it all the way there. I waved my hands wildly, as much as I could manage, desperately hoping for a portal to open and save me. I was met with no such luck. Before I no longer had the chance, I covered my head with my arms. My body broke through the roof of an old, rotting building.

I landed in the center of a boxing ring with a heavy inhale. I forced out coughs repeatedly to get my breath back. Adopting yet another wheeze from a rough fall, I rolled on my stomach. I sobbed into the mat. My sorrow turned quickly into frustration. It wasn't long before my knuckles were red with blood from relentless pounding.

I just wanted to go home.

"Angel..."

I froze.

"It's been so long..."

I dropped my head into my hands. I shook my head, biting back my tears. Dealing with my situation now was hard enough. Being subjected to Steve, the man I failed to save, was a form of torture that succeeded in causing my heart to be clenched and beaten.

Every word he said made my entire body shake with disappointment. Any breath I heard him inhale, all I remembered was hearing his last shaky breath in my ear before he crashed. Before I left him alone.

"You... I haven't... I a-asked for you when I woke up. You were the first thing I asked about. The doctors, they told me no one else was found in the plane," said Steve. His voice trembled. "Y-You left me."

"It wasn't my choice, I never would have left you if I had the option," I defended.

"'Choice' ?" repeated Steve. "What do you mean choice? You have powers. You control them."

I stared at my useless hands. "Not anymore..."

"What do you mean?" he whispered.

"I don't know, Steve! Where in your life I show up is not my decision. Something is forcing me through your timeline, through every situation I can fail! I can't do this anymore! I'm sick of failing you, a-and Bucky, and I'm tired. Failing the two of you is the worst feeling I've ever burdened."

Steve stepped closer. He paused, when I scurried from him, but then continued to approach my crouching figure. I held out my hand when he stood directly behind me. He stopped.

"Just... Please. Tell me where you've been."

I clenched my fingers into my hair. Any memories of where I had been were smudged together, as though forgetting them was in my near future. I closed my eyes, trying to dive into my head to recall where I was thrown.

"You were getting beat up in an alley, according to Bucky. He was looking for you. Then, I found you in a show--"

"What show?" interrupted Steve.

I chuckled. "Star Spangled Man With A Plan, huh?"

"What was depressing about that?"

"You tell me. I thought it was the shorts."

Steve scoffed. "Where else did you see me?"

"You were in some camp--"

"The 107th," finished Steve, shaking his head. "I never wanted to be doing that. A friend told me I was meant for more than that. She told me I was capable of doing something more than a joke."

"Peggy," I mumbled.

"How..?"

I shrugged. "Angel, remember?"

"Shouldn't an Angel know their goal in life?" he asked skeptically.

"In theory," I frowned.

"So you don't know why you were sent to Earth?"

"You could say that."

"God didn't give you a mission?"

"Thor was a bit busy to talk to me."

"'Thor'?" asked Steve. "What God--"

I abruptly stood. "I need to go. I have to find out where I am."

"Let me help you," offered Steve quickly, grabbing my hand. "Please, Angel. I'm as curious to know about you as much as you are."

I turned my head at the slightest. "You can't. I have to remain a mystery to you."

"Why? Why can't I help you? It's not right that I'm not able to repay you for all the times you helped me."

"I've never helped you!" I shouted, ripping my hand out of his grasp. "I haven't saved you from anything!"

"Angel--"

"No, you listen to me. I don't know why I was sent back, or what I'm here for, or why I don't have control over when I leave! All I wanted was to be with you! That's all I asked for! I didn't ask to be thrown through time to do that!"

A sudden wave of fatigue hit my head. I stumbled, falling into Steve's arms on accident. I clutched onto his embrace. He cradled my body into his chest. He ensured our faces never aligned, per my previous request.

"I miss you so much," I whispered.

"I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere," he promised.

"But I am..."

"Not right now you're not. If I'm touching you, it can't take you. I'm not supposed to leave this spot in time, right?"

"I don't know," I said hopelessly.

"We can take that chance. I'll take that chance. I'll stay with you as long as you need me to."

I shook my head, trying to wiggle from his grasp. A slight movement brought pain shooting through my brain. I settled instantly.

"No," I managed to get out. "No, I won't take the chance of anything happening to you."

"I never asked you to."

"It's not up to you."

"It's not your job to protect me. I'm responsible for my life, my actions. Do you hear me? Do you?"

Frowning, I mumbled, "I hear you."

"Can I ask you a question?" he whispered a while later.

I hummed in response.

"Are you truly an Angel?"

"No."

"Who are you?"

"I don't know anymore," I said honestly.

"Well... Can I know your real name?"

"What year is it?"

"Um... Uh, 2012."

"Not for two more years."

"Do you promise?"

I kissed his hand. "I promise."