Not Without You {Steve/Bucky Fic} COMPLETED

Chapter Seventeen

It was like he no longer had any life. No ambitions, no goals, no purpose.

He just sat in his apartment, vacant of the presence of another human being, and would stare at the wall.

Steve felt utterly alone.

Empty.

Afraid.

Weak.

He was going through the same emotions that he'd previously experienced after the first attack with Loki.

He then had nothing to fight, nothing to look forward to.

Everyone that he'd known in the past was dead expect Peggy, who's mind would snap in and out of remembering him.

As much as he cared for and admired Peggy, it hurt him too much to see her in such a weak state.

His weekly visits became monthly, his monthly became more sporadic, until he could vaguely recall his last visit with the woman.

Then she was gone.

Steve had felt awful, but however, didn't have much time to dwell on it.

Within hours, he was in the center of another battle.

To say that Steve didn't have feelings for Peggy would be a lie.

He truly did care for her and respect her greatly.

That has back when having feelings for your friend, who was another man, was forbidden.

So Steve had hid them. Convinced himself that he saw Bucky as nothing more than his best friend.

But right when he would think that he had himself convinced, Bucky would peer down at him with those big grey eyes, and get his heart pumping.

Bucky would playfully put his arm over Steve's skinny shoulders, and Steve would have to try his very best not to let his face turn bright red.

Then he met Peggy.

Sure, he still had strong feelings for Buck, but he couldn't help but wonder if Bucky would even like him as 'Captain America ', or if he even thought about Steve when he was off fighting.

So he spent his time with Peggy for the time being, and he adored her.

He also adored Bucky.

He wasn't quite sure how he felt between men and women.

But now Peggy was gone. And so was Bucky.

He had lost them both.

Steve sat on his bed, his head resting in his hands as he replayed the thoughts in his mind.

You lost them both, his mind told him.

The man sighed as a single tear made its way out of his eye and landed on his cheek.

He was finally pulled out of his depressing thoughts by the sound of his phone ringing.

It was Nick Fury.

Suddenly getting nervous, since he knew Nick would never call him Just to chat, Steve hesitantly clicked the green button.

"Hello? " he said, trying to mask the shake that was in his voice from crying.

Fury was silent for a long time.

"Fury? " Steve asked, getting concerned.

He heard the man let out a sigh, and Steve knew there was bad news.

"Nick? Is this about. . . Did something happen to Bucky? "

Fury finally answered him, bit not before letting out another sigh. "Nothing new on Barnes. Sorry. This is about Natasha. "

"Natasha? What about her? "

Another long pause. "She's dead. "

*********

He couldn't have a dog. He knew he couldn't.

He was barely feeding himself as it was.

The thing started following him down some alley the day before and wouldn't lay off.

Bucky had passed it as he wandered the backroads of Brooklyn, not giving it a second look as he passed the skinny, mangy looking yellow lab sitting all alone by the dumpster.

However, the dog had clearly decided that following Bucky on his trek through the town for God knows what reason seemed like a good idea.

A day later, the puppy was still trailing along beside him, it's pink tongue out and it's skinny tail wagging happily.

Bucky shook his head as he looked at the dog, and for about the hundredth time that day attempted at getting it to leave him alone. "Go on, get outta here. " He said.

The dog just looked at him, continuing to wag it's tail.

"Go home! I can barely take care of myself. "

The dog sat down at Bucky's feet nonchalantly.

Bucky sighed as he sat down beside the dog, pressing his back against the cool brick of the alleyway.

Scratching behind the dogs ear with his metal fingers, Buck said, "You would follow me to the ends of the earth, wouldn't ya? "

The dog let out a whine and tilted his head in appreciation for Bucky's ear rubs.

"I guess we have something in common, then. " Bucky said softly. "We would both follow someone who doesn't care about us the same way we care about them. " He felt his whole mood darken as he pictured Steve's face in his mind.

Shaking off the thought, he made a decision. "Well, I guess you can stick around for as long as I can keep ya, pal. "

The dog didn't respond.

Obviously.

It stuck its tongue out and gave Bucky's hand a single lick.

The man cracked a smile. "I'll call you Scout. "

Scout thumped his tail against the cement.

Bucky reached into his backpack and took out a Gronala bar that he had swiped from a Gas Station earlier that day.

Peeling off the wrapper, he broke it into two pieces and gave one half to his new friend.

The dog scarfed it down gratefully.

"It's not a steak, I know. I'll do better next time. " He promised.

He took a bite and savored the taste, the first thing he had eaten since he left D. C.

Maybe he could get my on his own.

Just him and Scout.

Maybe.

Yeah, yeah, boring chapter, I know. The next shall be better, I promise. Y'all should try voting and commenting, it makes me feel all fuzzy.
And I just get all excited getting notifs.
Aaaanyway thanks for reading! <3