Dear Diary,
Still not enough time to write about all the changes since last month, but I will say that I don't like Him anymore, and I find it so...disturbing how I wrote about him before. Anyways, I stopped liking him mid-October and started liking someone else recently. Weird I know and I seem like one of those sluts or whores, but I don't intend on getting with him, so I'm not.
So the reason I am writing today, I have no clue. I just have been thinking more and more on that subject, and it's scary how low my self-esteem is. I don't know how much more of life I can take. Quite honestly choir was the only thing keeping me alive for the last 3 years, and after I leave my school this year, I don't know how I'll survive.
Another realization I made was at lunch today, while I was trying to keep my food down, my sister was telling me about how my aunt thought she was still a 5th grader even though she's in 6th. I then tried to remember how old I was. My first thought was 3 years younger than I really am. 3 years since I felt like I was really alive, since I lived, not just breathe, not just existed. 3 years with depression, and I 'm not sure how long I'll last. I find that scary yet intriguing. I don't think I'll last very long after this year, but maybe I'll find something that will keep me going.
Scary thoughts aside, I still have homework and writing on my Wattpad account to do, so I'll stop writing for now.
-J
YOU ARE READING
Dear Diary
Teen FictionDiary from a girl with more problems then she lets the world see. She may be popular, but it's not like it matters when her world feels like it's about to come crashing down. She may not believe in love, but it's not like that'll stop her from feeli...
