To The Friend I Had In Middle School..

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To the friend I had in middle school,

We were friends for a little over two years. You were my sister, my other half. We were attached at the hips and we did everything together.

For about nine months, we planned our sweet sixteen parties.

Mine was going to be black and white themed. I would have a three tiered cake with black pipe work and a letter S would be in the middle of the top tier. I wanted black and white lace streamers hanging from one end of the room to the other and the lights would reflect off disco ball like plates. You thought it was too boring but it suited me well.

You wanted a bright, neon themed party. You wanted a five tier cake, each tier being a different neon color with white accents. Your name was going to be spelled out with white modeling chocolate and stuck onto the top of the cake. You wanted bright flashing lights and neon colored streamers hanging from the ceiling. You wanted balloons and flowers, the whole nine yards.

We were polar opposites but we balanced each other out.

In about three and a half months, I'll be sixteen and a month later you'll turn sixteen too.

I don't want a party anymore. I don't want a whole bunch of people to show up as a surprise. I don't want anybody to come, really. Why should they come to my party when I'm treated like a don't exist every day? So I don't want a party nor do I want people to show up.

I haven't talked to you in almost three years but I'm positive that you still want a party. A huge party where everybody is invited. I loved sneaking out away from everybody but you always loved being the center of attention, all the time.

You were good at it too, always having the attention on you. It came naturally to you but you always had a fit when I wanted to stay in the shadows.

I hope that in December you have your dream party. A huge party, a bright party. One with lots of people and lots of cake.

I also hope you let go of us. Stop carrying around guilt and anger. I'm not mad anymore, you shouldn't be either. It was years ago, we were young and dumb. You made middle school somewhat okay for a while. That was nice. Just do one last thing for me and let go of the past. You're stubborn and hot headed, I know you haven't let it go yet. But it's time. It's okay now.

So to the friend I had in middle school... you better have one huge party with everything you ever dreamed. You've been talking about it for long enough, in a couple months you better have the sweet sixteen you only dreamt about when we were young.

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