To my ex boyfriend,
You were a close friend before we started dating. You held me together for so long.. I can't thank you enough for that.
We ended abruptly. Well, we started abruptly too.
You called my mother and asked if it was alright if we started dating. It was so sweet. Hilarious, but thoughtful.
You're an amazing person. You're childish but in the best way. You're sensitive and caring. You're a complete dork. You really are a wonderful guy.
But when I said it was me, it was me. You did nothing wrong, please don't blame yourself because we didn't work out.
It was deep inside my gut. A feeling that needed to be addressed because every time I went out with you or even just saw you, I couldn't handle it.
It was extremely confusing. I wasn't comfortable. I just wasn't truly being myself and when I realized that, we sat down and talked.
I couldn't love you the same way you loved me.
It has nothing to do with you. It's me, and I know that now.
I'm gay, I like girls. You know that too, I told you. If we had stayed together, our relationship wouldn't have gone any further. I would have been holding you back. I couldn't put you through that.
You deserve somebody who can love you the way you love them. You deserve somebody who can give you everything you need in a relationship.
I just couldn't do that.
But that doesn't mean I hate you or look down at you.
We made some great memories. Like when we went to the fair and you ended up getting sick because we went on Zero Gravity too many times. I can't believe you couldn't ride it 11 times. Amateur.
But, on a rather serious note, I still think you're an amazing guy. I wish you nothing but the best because that's exactly what you deserve.
So to my ex boyfriend... I couldn't hold you back any longer. You deserve a relationship that isn't one-sided. You deserve the world, you really do. But please understand I couldn't give that to you.
