If This Lasts (If This #2) Published Under Bliss Books)

Chapter Twenty-Four

Hinarap ko si Zion na ngayon ay nakatayo na malapit sa akin. Matalim ang iginawad ko sa kanyang tingin. Magkasalubong ang dalawa kong kilay. Kulang na lang ay bumuga na ako ng apoy para malaman niya na galit ako.

"You planned this didn't you?" I spat, my voice filled with accusation.

"I'm sorry. I just... really need a moment alone with you." maamong sagot nito sa akin. Pati ang mukha niya ay parang nagsusumama habang nakatingin sa akin. "Let's talk, Savion. Please..."

"Ayaw kitang makausap!" galit na sabi ko at matapos ay tumalikod para makaalis na sa tubig at pumunta na sa seashore.

I once hated how persistent Zion is. I once hated how he does everything to get what he wants, whatever it takes—be it, with his tricks or wicked ways... He'll do it.

I used to hate it before but when I realized that I was in love with him, it became one of the reasons why I fell in love him.

Pero ngayon na may kaonting galit pa ako sa kanya at kinakailangan ko ng oras na wala siya sa paligid ay hindi ko magawang hayaan na lang ang ginawa niyang ito. It sounded really irrational in my head, but then, the mind can never argue with the heart.

When it comes to your feelings, you'll always use your heart, and unfortunately—it doesn't have the ability to think. All it does is feel... Hurt, anger, or love. It's all the same.

"I've tried so hard, alright?!" nakaapak na ako sa basang buhangin nang biglang sumigaw si Zion. Napahinto ako sa paglalakad ngunit hindi ko siya hinarap. "I've tried to stay away from you for two days. I've waited for you for three years. I've tried so hard to stay away and wait. It's all I've done."

I could hear the hurt in his voice. It was piercing right through my heart. There's suddenly a slight twinge in my chest. I can almost feel the pain that he was feeling.

Kumuyom ang panga ko sa galit habang ang mga mata ko naman ay nanlalabo. My emotions were jumbling inside my chest. Hinarap ko siya. He's already standing in front of me.

I fiercely shook my head, staring at him as I tried to halt the tears from falling down. "Don't put that on me. I never asked you to wait for me."

"I can still remember how thrilled I was to come home to you that night. The whole drive, all I could think about was your surprise for me. When I saw the mess on the floor, I knew something was wrong. But when I saw the look on your face─when you slapped me..." napapikit siya ng mariin na parang nararamdaman niya pa rin ang sampal ko sa kanya. "That night wrecked me, Savion. I went on my knees and pleaded for you to stay... pero iniwan mo pa rin ako."

"Iniwan kita kasi niloko mo ako! Nagsinungaling ka sa akin!" sigaw ko sa kanya, tuluyan ang bumagsak ang mga luha sa pisngi ko dahil sa pinaghalong poot at sakit.

"I lied because I was scared that I'd lose you!" he shouted back, his eyes red from the tears building up in it. He looked just as mad and broken as me.

"And you still lost me because you lied!"

"Bakit? Kapag ba sinabi ko sa'yo ang totoo, hindi mo ako iiwan? You'd still leave me! I know you will! Because between the two of us, I'm the one who loves more! Kapag nawala ako sa'yo, ayos lang... Pero ako? Mahal na mahal kita kaya nung nawala ka sa akin, wasak na wasak ako!"

"Paanong hindi kita iiwan kung una pa lang nagsinungaling ka na sa akin?! Sinira mo kami ni Axl! Pinaniwala mo ako na niloko niya ako! Niloko mo ako dahil iyon ang inutos sa'yo ng pinsan mo!" I screamed as I cried in between sentences.

Naalis ang galit sa mukha ni Zion. Kumunot ang kanyang noo at gumuhit ang pagkagulo sa mukha niya. "What?"

"I was so hurt when I found out. I didn't want to believe it. Hindi ko matanggap na nagawa mo sa akin yon. But when I told you about it and I read your reaction..." napahinto ako dahil sa hikbi na tumakas sa akin.