nine

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early update bc i have no idea when i will get internet again

phil

"phil! is there a spider on my head?" dan yells frantically, and i shine my torch in his direction causing him to stop his actions and shield his eyes from the bright light.

"what the fuck!" he yells again and i bite my tongue in apology, lowering my torch.

"sorry," i mumble and he just rubs his eyes, shooting a sharp glare in my direction afterwards. the sun is setting rapidly by the second and i am disappointed by the fact that it does not look as magical as i thought it would.

the fact that i've spent my entire seventeen years inside my house and have literally been to the park twelve times in my entire lifetime, i had great expectations from the sunrise and sunset and the moon and whatever story books talk about. to say the least, i was just disappointed looking at the clump of orange spreading across the sky.

"do you think this is enough wood?" he asks, running his fingers through his tangled hair, gesturing to the cloth bag that is almost completely full of twigs and dry branches and leaves.

"i guess? i mean for tonight it should be enough," i tell him but he just rolls his eyes, picking up the bag and leading the way towards our tent. i am happy that in our short walk inside the forested areas, we haven't encountered any wild pigs or giant rodents or possibly any animal that has teeth longer than mine.

i would literally cry on the spot and surrender myself to the obviously hungry beast.

i follow close behind dan and watch as he knots the top of the cloth bag, and zips up our tent, before opening the map, the torch he was using is now in between his teeth.

"what on earth are you doing?" i scrunch my eyebrows at his attempt of reading the map and he just raises his eyebrows dismissively at me before pulling the torch out of his mouth, a trail of saliva following and he screws up his face in disgust.

"trying to read the map, now come on let's go," he instructs and begins to walk towards the gravelly paths.

"where are we going?"

"dinner obviously. have you got any money on you?" he asks, turning his head to look at me and i pat my pockets before replying.

"yeah," i tell him and he just nods, wiping the back of the torch against his jeans and i physically cringe. the myth that boys are disgusting and are pigs, originates from people like dan howell.

i quietly follow him, noticing the shadows casted by the trees become darker by the second, the soft light of the sky disappearing and fading into shades of grey and black, and just five minutes into our walk, the sky is almost completely dark, a few grey clouds floating in the sky and the moon is nowhere to be seen.

"phil?" dan's voice is wavering as he flashes the torch in my direction and i just hum in response.

"oh good, you're here," he sighs, and it sounds like a sigh of relief.

"are you scared of the dark?" i ask him, walking a little quicker so i am next to him instead of behind him, and he quickly looks at me, staring down at his feet as he answers.

"w-what are we? ten? i am not scared," he doesn't sound too convincing but i let it go either way, because firstly, i am not a dick like him, and secondly, i don't want him to cuss me out.

i don't respond to his statement, i just flick my torch over uneven rocks and small plants to entertain myself and i am very aware of dan's arm brushing against mine every once in a while.

"can you move over a little?" i nudge his shoulder with mine and when i look at him his cheeks are flushed, his lip caught between his teeth. he looks like he is slightly bothered by my statement but he doesn't say anything back, he just wordlessly shifts more towards his right.

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hi do you still like this book

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