phil
turns out that pitching a tent, is not as easy as it looks.
especially when combined with awkward long silences and accidental brushing of hands every once in a while.
i wipe the thin layer of sweat off my forehead with the sleeve of my jacket and walk over to dan, who is hammering the last peg of our tent into the ground. his hair is almost completely curled now, sweat rolling down the side of his face and his cheeks are flushed from the heat.
if i'm being honest, dan did most of the work to set up our tent because i was too clumsy to push the tent poles through the fabric, and i have already hit myself while trying to hammer down a peg. the only thing i've done is clip the tent properly in place and assist dan while he did all the work but he doesn't seem to mind.
it's not like i haven't done anything at all though. i have aimlessly shovelled the ground with a sharp rock and a long branch, to create a fire pit and i think it's safe to say that it is almost a foot deep, which is pretty convenient.
i am still mad at dan, and it sickens me that he would choose to believe the school rumours to define my personality. it was a major dick move but i am known for not holding grudges against people for long, and so when dan brushes the dust off his jeans and gives me a small smile before getting up, i have no option but to smile back, and watch him approach me.
"we did this! it looks so good," his voice is excited and both his hands point to the tent with open palms, as he stares at the small accommodation with a toothy grin, deep dimples carving in his cheeks.
"yeah," i reply softly, and hear him sighing in response as i move away from him towards our bags.
"phil," he calls, almost whining and i turn my head a little to look at him, raising my eyebrows slightly in question.
"are you still mad? i didn't mean to say that," he says walking over to me, and crouching down beside me, copying my actions and attempting to collect his bags.
"okay," i reply shortly, getting up and walking off, the weight of my duffle surprising me as i haven't held it in a while.
the blue sky is fading into a soft pink, shades of orange and red and yellow and the sun is beginning to set, causing birds to chirp loudly and the trees to cast deep shadows over the ground. i figure we should go and find the fire wood before it's too late and i look over to dan to run the idea past him.
"dan?" my voice is still quiet and he looks back at me, nodding his head, urging me to continue.
"should we go and get the fire wood now, before it's too late?" i suggest, unzipping the tent while waiting for his response and soon he hums in agreement, following my movements and entering the tent after me, both us crouching awkwardly because of our heights.
"it's so dark in here," dan comments, and he is actually right. it is kind of really dark and if i zip the tent, i'm afraid we'll be able to see anything at all. soon enough, dan has tied a flashlight to the roof of the tent, switching it on so an annoying white light bounces off the yellow fabric.
"which side do you want?" he asks me, and i look up at him confused. i thought he would probably play on another one of my insecurities to get his way, but i'm pleasantly surprised that he didn't, and actually asked me first.
"the left side, if you don't want it," i smile at him and he just bites his lip, an uncomfortable expression on his face as he moves to the right hand side.
"i usually sleep on the left side at home, but it's okay," he says already beginning to get out his sleeping bag and extra blankets and i instantly feel the guilt prodding inside me.
"no, no it's completely fine if you want to sleep here, i don't mind," i tell him but he just shakes his head.
"no, it's okay, it's the least i can do," he says, his eyes not meeting mine. "i am genuinely sorry for what i said, i didn't mean it," he adds quickly and i give him an awkward smile.
"it's okay i guess," i begin unpacking. "thanks," i say after a moment of uncomfortable silence and he snaps his head towards me, his eyes appearing lighter and warmer in the harsh light.
"for what?"
"i don't know for apologising i guess? being nice?" i shrug and see an embarrassed smile stretch across his lips before he snorts.
"don't feel special, i just apologised because i have no one else to talk to at this camp," he snickers, a hint of amusement in his tone and i roll my eyes at him.
"back to being an asshole i see,"
"always," he winks, and i say nothing but roll my eyes again.
--
nobody thinks what i think
