Diary of a Sociopath

Chapter 10- Christmas Eve

Everything changed within a matter of a week. Ava grew suspicious of me as I was coming and going at all hours. Since that night, I couldn't get more than ten feet from her before she locked me out. Even as I tried to explain, sent her flowers, and even hired one of those dancing telegrams. But each time, she rejected my attempt to ease things. But I still remained close-under the darkness of nightfall as she had neglected to notice me.

Christmas Eve

As I had done for the last week, I lingered in my car hidden under a low tree and stared ahead to the house belonging to the woman I had come to adore. My mind flashed back to our time in bed together and how she pulled me so close into her-and now I couldn't get less than a meter from her. My gaze shifted to the paper I had on the seat beside me as I then looked up criminal news on my phone-to be sure nobody was on my trail. I also played the local police scanner on my radio as I was gifted with an accidental break in the wave length.

But my gaze never broke from the house for more than a minute. At six that night, a purple car pulled in front of her house as I jumped up in my seat. I recognized the car as it was the same one I smashed a few months prior. The windows were fixed, but the doors were still dented from my bar-still in the back of my car. Readying to get out of the car, I was surprised to find her welcome the person so sweetly-as if she knew him previously. Before too long, the door was closed and the only thing I had was a small vision through her dim windows.

My eyes froze on the duo as Matthew was told to go to his room as I saw her point in that direction. I saw this as my chance as I snuck around to his window and gently knocked as he jumped up eagerly.

"Lincoln!" He said enthusiastically as I smiled.

"I am trying to surprise your mother. Can you let me in?" I realized now, how this could be traumatizing for any other kid-but not Matthew. He was so trusting-which made me nervous.

He allowed me in via window as I instructed him to keep quiet in his room  and listen to music in headphones, as I hid around the corners, following them as they moved about the house. I discovered their conversation consisted of a man named Ramone. After describing him, I realized it had been the man that attempted to rape her-the same one who slashed my car up, and the same one that I had killed.

"I am coming to you as I know your connection to his attempted killer..." My eyes grew wide. I had failed. He lived..the vermin lived! I couldn't believe it! I felt his skin cold in my hands-and yet, he lived against all odds.

"What are you asking exactly?"

"If you don't want anything else unfortunate to happen...you will deliver Lincoln to us. He knows the place."

The conversation ended before she escorted him to the door. But just before the door closed, he caught it. "I would hate to see a woman as beautiful as you with a .22 caliber bullet between her eyes. Or to end up like Ray."

She remained quiet, knowing it was smartest this way, before turning to find me standing against the wall behind her. Reaching for the phone on the counter, I knocked it from her hand and held her against the wall. Trembling in my hands, I could feel how she truly terrified me. Enough to not want me to even touch her. But I had to-I had to make her understand.

"I will do whatever you ask me to, Ava...but you must stay away from them."

"I want you to go where they want you to. I want you to face Ramone and then....I want nothing to do with you..."

I glared in confusion before asking her why she was being so cruel.

"Because I can't trust you!" She said angrily before hitting me. "You know how difficult that is for me to do! And somehow everyone around me that hurts me ends up dead or almost dead! What am I supposed to think about that?"

"Those you associate yourself with are bad people. I'm not the only person who has vendettas against them."

"So you do admit it? You wished them dead?"

"Of course I did! I wanted Ray the farthest f*****g distance from you because I knew you loved him at some point. I knew that when you saw him, you had memories I didn't have with you! That he was there before me, that he got to touch you and make you moan before I could! I want to possess you with every inch of my body but I know that I'm not the first for you!"

"You're acting as if I am the first for you..."

Suddenly she took my silence as the thing I feared most; her knowing her effect.

"I was your first?"

I nodded. "I can't explain what I feel for you, but I know that I need to protect you. You don't have anybody that can do that. So if you want me to go see Ramone and his men to end this, I will-but don't accuse me of killing someone I didn't! It is no secret that I loathed him, but I would have never took him away from Matthew-I promised you that."

Due to her silence, I knew I had reached her to some point, but not enough for her to ask me to stay or say she understood. Just enough to not look at me as though she hated me.

"I'll go-"

"No."

"What?"

"It's an ambush. If you go, you will certainly be outnumbered and...and I need you. I can't trust you right now...but I do need to-so does Matthew...So if you care-then don't go."

"But they couldn't hurt you-"

"With you by my side...I know that I'll be fine."

She embraced me as she rested her head on my chest before commenting on my racing heart. I explained how I was afraid to lose her and she just continued to hold me.

10:00 P.M.

Something about the click of the clock with Ava resting against me made me feel like a King. As though I could survive on only this. But as the minutes clicked away into wasted time, she rose to her feet and extended her hand to me.

"Come lay with me..." She said with a tired voice as I couldn't help but smile. I didn't want to sleep with her every night to the point of being sweaty and exhausted-I just wanted to be the one next to her. And she gave that to me.

11:08 P.M.

I awoke with a pulling feeling in my stomach before finding I was alone in the bed. Searching around, I heard the water running in the bathroom and smirked at the idea of her being so bare-so close. Taking everything but my boxers from my body, I went to surprise her before finding the shower to be running in an empty corner. I glanced around in hopes of finding evidence to her whereabouts, but found nothing in her bedroom.

As I made it to the hall, my eyes came upon a scene. The cushions on the couch were set all around the living room while wet prints were prominent until the middle of the house-where they ceased. Moving outside, I saw skid marks in front of the house as well as a smashed windshield of my car.

They were going to pay if they hurt her-even just because they took her. They wanted to lure me...they were going to get their request...only now...it wouldn't be pleasant for them...