Short Jeremy Shada Imagines

Short Story #23

I flicked ash onto the ground. It watched it glow bright orange for a minute before putting it out with my shoe. I looked over my shoulder to make sure no one was coming outside. I took another long drag from my cigarette and blew the smoke out my nose. I kept the cigarette inbetween my lips as I slowly took of my brackets. I glanced at my arm lined with scars and some fresh cuts.  I was pissed at myself for them I angrily pulled the cigarette out of my mouth. How could I let it get this bad. I took a long drag and waited a while before blowing out the smoke. I hated myself. For everything. I put the bracelets back on and took a few more drags from my cigarette.  I heard the door open behind me. "Are you-smoking?" Jeremy asked. Jeremy had lived next door to me my entire life. He was the only one who cared about me still. "Nope. Just holding a cigarette." I said turning away from him. "Ha. Ha. Hilarious." He said plainly. "You really shouldn't smoke..." he continued. I shrugged. "Who cares? I'm gonna die eventually." I said taking another drag from the cigarette before tossing it on the ground and stomping it out. "I care. I care about you. I don't want you hurting yourself anymore than you already have." I shook my head. "Jeremy there's nothing you can do. I already hate myself." I scoffed. "Well I love you. Yes, I said I love you. You're beautiful and sweet and caring. You care about everyone but yourself." He said on the verge of tears. I started to say something but I didn't know what to say so I ran and gave him a hug. I cried into his shoulder. I let it all out. "Thanks Jeremy." I sobbed. I knew he'd always be there for me. I also knew I was in love with him also, I just couldn't let him know that. Not yet.