BTS Fluff Party

i don't mean it - Jinkook

Jungkook hates Taehyung.

Taehyung is a no good, dirty, rotten scoundrel, a terrible best friend and the worst roommate in the history of roommates.

"Kookie, you do remember that today is opposite day, so everything you're saying is automatically translated into 'Taehyung is a very good, lovely, sweet gentleman, a wonderful best friend and the best roommate in the history of roommates,' right? Don't bother scowling at me, I only see it as a smile. Oh, that's it, grin like there's no tomorrow. Now I know you're angry."

"Can we pause for just a second so we can have a normal conversation?"

"You're talking with Kim Taehyung, how normal is it usually?"

"Shut up, Yoongi, you're not helping."

"Do you wanna die, brat?"

Jungkook resorts to flailing his exceptionally long limbs and stomping around like a two year-old having a temper tantrum. Taehyung and Yoongi patiently wait for him to gather himself and his exceptionally long limbs.

"Your hyung thinks that I'm the nicest person he's ever met, and it's all not your fault!"

"Ah, you're getting the hang of this. You never were very good at getting the hang of things if you didn't want to. You're never gonna last in the real world. But back to the subject at hand: yes, Jin thinks you're incredibly rude or else that he's done something to offend you, which, let's be real, is totally possible, because you're offended by the weirdest things sometimes, but also, let's be real, isn't possible because my brother is the sweetest person alive and it's definitely your fault that he's feeling so down."

"He's feeling down? I'm the one feeling up! Oh gosh, that just sounds...ugh. Whatever. I didn't mean to keep running into him, and now I've said such terrible things and all because YOU have way too much laundry. Like, seriously Tae, what the heck? Did you just save it all for this dare?"

"Yeah, pretty much. I'll let you off the hook when you're not talking to me, because yeah, that was rather uncomfortable. There's really a great solution to this whole mess."

Jungkook throws Taehyung a scathing glance. Yoongi is not so subtly watching the whole thing out of the corner of his eye. "Oh yeah? And what, pray, is that?"

Taehyung shrugs. "Just explain yourself and do my laundry."

"I am NOT doing your laundry. It's like six loads or something. No, no, no."

"All right, explain yourself in such a way that you needn't do the laundry."

"I'd have to apologize backwards!"

Yoongi snorts. "Good luck with that."

--

Jungkook and Taehyung are best friends, most of the time. Sometimes they're mortal enemies and sometimes they're casual acquaintances that throw shady looks at each other until Yoongi forces them to talk their differences out and usually ends of hitting one or both of them over the head and telling them straight out that the consumption of each other's chocolate stashes aren't reason to stop being friends, will they ever grow up, he's too old for this nonsense.

Taehyung has an older brother that Jungkook has never met, because they've only been best friends since the first day of college and Taehyung boasts about Seokjin like he's an angel sent from heaven. When Jungkook finally meets him, he agrees instantly that Seokjin is very handsome and very sweet and why, why, why must it be opposite day? Why did he let Taehyung convince him that this would be easy? Because now, now he can't tell Seokjin that he thinks he's handsome or that he's sweet or even that it's nice to meet him.