Lost and Found

Chapter 47

Wali's POV

With my hands firmly holding the bouquet of pink carnations and white peonies as their fragrance was filing up the hall way I was struggling with the keys, after a day of endless meetings and conferences and late night scheduling I decided to leave Boston earlier than planned to surprise Khadija and now at 7:30 in the morning I finally entered the place which holds my heart more than it ever did, my home. I smiled as I stood at the foyer, all my exhaustion leaving the body as I looked at the bright sunlight making their way in to the living room through long glass walls, spreading their warmth all around the place.

Keeping my laptop bag and hand carry by the entrance I made my way further inside, the entire apartment was drown in the odd silence I have lost acquaintance with, in past one year this place have absorbed many emotions and today every wall of our home was alarming me about the one I am not ready for, ignoring the tying knot in my stomach I searched for my lady but frowned when I realized that she must be at Abdullah bhai's place.

"So much for the surprise!" I shook my head as I turned with a sheepish smile towards the entrance again, ready to leave for bringing her back. Taking the cell phone out of my pocket I turned it on to call Yahya when I heard the doors above getting unlocked. Frowning I locked the phone again and placing it on the kitchen counter I made my way towards the stairs.

I was on the fourth step when she came in front of me and my lips moved forming a grin, but it just took a single look on her face and something crashed deep down inside me, she was rooted to her place, her face lost its color and it was terribly pale, her chapped lips were more like bruised as if she had bitten them mercilessly, and those eyes which would always make me weak but were the source of my strength were terrifyingly hollow, the spark in them was burned out, instead they were lost, lost in a land which was far from my reach.

"Asalam O Alikum," I heard myself whisper in a grave voice as I climbed the stairs towards her but stopped in my place when I saw her shifting her place and looking away, my hands were turning colder by minute.

"You are here early?" the question was a scaring interrogation made in a deadly cold tone but the tears shimmering in her eyes were a jab to my heart.

"I," I licked my dry lips as I tried to read her face, "I wanted to surprise you," it felt more like a question than the statement.

"You should have called," the two of us were making meaningless conversations but a part of me was telling that the meaningful one would only break me more.

Gathering all the courage in me I took steps to be right in front of her, taking her left hand which were freezing in my right one I gave them a light squeeze and as if something crashed inside her which even I heard she broke down, the tears pooled in her eyes started soaking her pale cheeks and she bit on her lips making them more purple as she stopped a sob.

"Khadija," my voice came out as a cry, as I moved my hands and cupped her cheeks, "Love what's wrong? Khadija talk to me?" and she completely broke all over again right in my arms. "Khadija, khuda kai liyai (For God's sake) you are scaring me!" I half whispered, half yelled as I tried to make her look at me.

"I am sorry, Wali! I am so sorry," was the words which came out of her mouth as she choked on her sob and keep repeating her words, "I am sorry," the fallen carnations were long forgotten as I tried to bring her back to me.

"Khadija, tell me what's wrong? I promise—"

As if my words ignited a fire she was already burning in, she pushed my arms away, "No Wali! Nothing you could ever do can make this right! None of your promises can turn my fate Wali," she looked at me and all of a sudden those chocolaty brown eyes scared me, "It's not your fault! It's me! It's solely me, I am the one to be blamed, I am the one who is hollow from inside!" she said as she hit herself and stoned to my place with my numb feet I just looked at her.