Lost and Found

Chapter 50

Sitting behind my mahogany desk on a high-back leather chair my hands were busy squeezing the small size basket ball while my eyes were glued on the glass walls of my office, though my eyes were focused on the soft snow flakes dancing in the air as they keep making their way downwards covering the ground with their purity, my mind on the other hand was back home with Khadija, as proud as I was for her continuous bravery and how courageously she is holding herself and moving on I am also fearing a part of her which has all of a sudden isolated herself from all the people around her, there is no Sunday dinners at our place anymore, she avoids going out with Rumaisa and Rafia and all of a sudden she had asked me to move to Virginia, it feels like she is running away, either from herself or from her fate. She is yearning for more endurance yet she is not stopping to get it.

I turned to face the door as I heard to knock to find Yahya peeking in with a silly grin.

"Andur ajao aisay kia khuray ho?" I shook my head as I placed the ball aside and resting both my hands on the desk I interlinked my fingers looking at my cousin who was still smiling with almost pleading eyes as he took a seat in front of me. The silence was covering us as I waited for him to speak while he kept rotating the paper weight with his forefinger and thumb while his eyes were enjoying his little fun, "Yahya is there something you want to say?" I finally broke the silence looking at his face as he bit his lower lip.

"I need a favor."

"I am listening," My answer made him straightened himself up as he finally met my eyes, his eyes were hesitant and his fingers were continuously taping the glass top of the desk. I passed an encouraging smile as I raised my eyebrow at him and he sighed in defeat.

"Okay so, um, look it's actually the situation is Rafia's birthday is coming up, next week to be précised," he looked at me again and I nodded, "I was planning to take her away, like a weekend getaway kind of thing and I need someone to babysit Ahyan during that time," he hesitantly whispered now not meeting my eyes, "I would have contacted Rumaisa bhabi but she and Dija are going to her mother's place and you know Murtaza can never take care of Ahyan alone," he let out a nervous chuckle and I shook my head.

"You don't have to ask us, Yahya. We would be glad to have the little guy over!" I smiled as I calmly replied.

"Are you sure? I mean you know I can understand if you both have plans? You can ask bhabi, actually you know what I'll plan someth—"

"Yahya!" I interjected his nervous rambling, "We'll be fine! We would love to have Ahyan over." My voice was steadier and I tried to avoid the edge in it.

"Wali," he rubbed his chin with his right hands, his eyes still showcasing his uncertainty which for some unknown reasons made my jaw clenched, I knew Khadija's distant behavior was being noticed by everyone else but to see it's result so clearly in front of my eyes were rather disturbing.

Yahya soon left but not after being completely assured and now I was thinking about how would I convince Khadija about the plan but a part of me knew she needs a pull out of her daunting isolation and this was the only way.

Running my hand through my hair I forced myself to focus back on the work at hand, being absorbed in the files and emails I didn't realize that sun had started hiding behind the horizon and the light blue sky was now covering with shades of blue merging with the vibrant shade of purple and magenta. The azan reminder made me pull my hand back from the keyboard of my laptop, rubbing my tired eyes I shutdown my laptop and then giving directions to Hannah I stood up to leave.

Driving through the busy roads of New York I was oblivious to my surrounding, my mind just keep wandering to the events which have taken place in my life in the short span of one year, sometimes I found myself keep thinking about my past to the point where I stop living in present, I made myself a firm believer of not sticking in past other than noticing the mistakes but lately I just keep reflecting every event which had happened in my life, from my somber childhood to my absurd youth, from fighting with my hidden demons to the clots which weighted my nerves and in the mid of chaos how my fate was connected to Khadija's, how the woman I just wanted to forgive me became the reason how I found my lost tranquility, how now we are one and how the two of us have strengthen each other beyond our believes.