I've tried, okay?
I really have.
Somehow I just can't.
I can't force myself out of love with you.
And I'm so sorry.
I try not to make it hard for you.
I be the best friend I can be.
But when I think about my future,
I see myself holding your hand.
Sitting on our front porch in the morning with our oversweetened coffees in our other hands.
I see myself laughing with you ten years from now as I'm trying to get ready for work.
I see myself waking up from a dreamless sleep and watching the sunrise slowly light your features.
I see one am fights and four am kisses.
I see myself driving you to work because I know how you hate to be behind the wheel.
I see late nights, early mornings and afternoon naps.
I see breakdowns and pick me ups and everything in between.
I see you grading papers and laughing at stupid essay replies.
I see drunk nights and hangover mornings.
I see knowing glances and your thumb rubbing across the back of my hands.
When I think of my future,
I think of you.
And that scares the living shit out of me.
Because I hate thinking about my future.
Not only because I don't know what will actually happen,
But because I know what I want will never happen.
I try not to make things hard on you.
But things aren't easy for me.
With that said,
I wouldn't change anything about you.
I love you.
9/26/16
YOU ARE READING
From My Mind To Your Pages
PoetryI have to get the words out of my head sometimes. This is a completed work of 9 years worth of writing about the boy I was in love with. 9 years of expressing my emotions in written form. 9 years of him reading every word and treating me like shit a...
