Aaron Carpenter Imagines & Preferences

Ruin

Aaron's POV:

"Hey Aaron." Y/n said happily, as she approached me in the hall. The sparkle in her eye, lighting up the room. I gave her a weak smile and waved.

"Hey." I whisper, as she passed me. Closing my eyes as her perfume left a beautiful trail in the crowded walkway. I held my breath, I didn't need her smell in my head. It already kept me up at night, pulling at my heart like a game of tug-of-war.

I stood still, waiting for it to pass. I remember when I used to carry that same smell on my clothes. Always being greeted by that wonderful smile of hers.

Those lips that used to be mine. Mine to kiss. I shook my head, trying to focus on something else.

•

I sat at my lunch table, quietly picking at my food. Ignoring the chatter around me, as I faded into my own reality. Then my head snapped up. Something had caught my attention. Not something, someone.

Y/n was laughing at the other end of the room, I softly smiled. She had the best laugh. I let my eyes rest on her, before my heart dropped into my stomach.

Her new boyfriend had sat next to her, showering her cheek with kisses. She giggled, tilting her head to the side. I used to kiss her like that.

She used to giggle like that because of me. I could still feel her soft skin on my lips.

I looked down. My friends left me alone, they knew what bothered me. They knew that the best thing for me was to let me be. They gave me sympathetic looks, looking at each other before standing up when the bell rang. I felt their pity like a knife in my back, but shook it off.

I stayed seated. Staring into the distance, letting my sadness eat me alive. Watching everyone leave the room. Letting the loudness full into a silence.

I don't know how long I sat there. Staring into empty space as if I was planning a Third World War. A screech of a chair made me jump, as my head whipped around. She was still here.

"Hey Aaron?"

"Yeah?" I say, turning back around. Letting my fingers aimlessly play with the edge of the table.

"Are you ok?" She said, moving to the seat in front of me. I didn't meet her eyes, as I tried to pretend I didn't miss her. I pretended for my own sake, putting up walls because of my insecurities. I took a deep breath before looking up.

"I'm fine." I said, a fake smile plastered on my lips. She looked over my face.

"I don't believe you." She said softly. I chuckled softly.

"I'm fine Y/n." I lied.

She sat silently. Then leaned forward on the table, looking deeply into my eyes.

"Aaron I know when you're lying to me." She said more seriously.

I shook my head. She was always this stubborn. Too sweet be ignored. Too stubborn to be tricked. I stood up, slinging my backpack over my shoulder.

"I'm great." I say, forcing another smile. But I knew she didn't believe me. She knew me too well.

And I guess that's the problem when you fall in love. You learn everything about the person, becoming an expert on them. Falling in love more and more as you begin to really know them.

I waved silently, and walked out of the door. Leaving her sitting at the table. Leaving my heart right next to her. Fighting the erg I had to go back and spill out my feelings.

Explain to her how I can't take it anymore. How I can't stand to see her without me. That I can't stop dreaming about how I wished things were different. Dreaming about her in my arms.

But I know she's happy. And that's all I want, for her to be happy.   And I can't take that away from her. Maybe it wasn't meant to be. Maybe I'm a fool. Maybe it wasn't love.

But there is one thing I know for sure. Without her I was empty. A beautiful soul that has had its use in the world. A shell of a man that used to have the world at his finger tips. A ruin.

A ruin of love.