Here's to the Heartache (Frerard) *Discontinued*

31: Happy Birthday To Frank

Life with Gerard compared to carrying on without him was a never ending study of startling contrasts which absolutely fascinated Frank, because everything had changed now that Gerard was his boyfriend again in the best way possible, but it seemed that he was the only one who noticed it.

On the surface, everything was the same, and that was all anyone saw, so even if Frank was smiling more often, or paying better attention in class, it wasn't a noteworthy attitude shift, and if a bystander had been asked if something was different with Frank lately, they would have most likely said no.

The only people who were aware that Gerard and Frank had gotten back together were Ryan, Brendon, and Pete, the latter of which Frank had been nervous about telling since he'd been afraid of recreating the uncomfortable tension that they'd only recently worked through, but Pete had seemed fine, and Frank had downplayed his excitement by a fair margin, but he'd still wanted Pete to share in this with him even if they had conflicting views on his relationship.

But besides those three, no one else was able to see underneath Frank's skin, no one knew about the core of contentment that Frank harbored within him, the sensation growing every time he awoke to a "good morning" text from Gerard or he spied his car parked a few blocks away so he could drive him closer to the school, saving Frank from the uncomfortable bus ride he would have had to endure otherwise even if Gerard had to drop him off a few blocks away so they wouldn't be seen arriving together.

But those occurrences, as simple as they were, meant the world to Frank. Each quick kiss and endearment energized him for hours afterward, making the stress of homework coupled with his shifts at the restaurant that much easier to bear until almost nightly Frank dozed off with a smile on his face instead of tears in his eyes.

Frank couldn't truly explain with words how being Gerard's again had improved his life so much, because when he truly took a step back and observed their relationship with a critical eye, he had to admit that it wasn't what he'd envisioned the few times he had entertained the idea of actually having a proper boyfriend.

Still, it was incredible nonetheless; Frank compared it to looking through the other side of a mirror, because he was still him, he still had all of his burdens and old wounds marring his insides, but he was seeing things with a new set of eyes, the shadows that had been obscuring his vision for so long had finally been lifted, allowing him to view the potential his existence held instead of only the darkness and the hopelessness that had been such a prevalent part of him until Gerard had come along.

Frank didn't actually even see Gerard all that often, definitely with much less frequency than he had during the summer, but they were both busy after all. Frank had to balance his responsibilities as a student along with making sure that he was setting aside time for his mother and Pete even if he'd love nothing more than to spend all of his free moments with Gerard, and Gerard had papers to grade and Mikey to look after not to mention appointments that he was actually going to now much to Frank's relief, so it was to be expected that they'd be apart more often than not, especially since the only place they could truly be together was Gerard's apartment.

They made up for it with texts though and so many phone calls that Frank began making sure that he hid the phone bill from his mother just in case she remarked on his sudden spike of activity. He could always brush it off as a new friend he'd made at school if he was caught of course, but it was better to avoid rousing his mother's suspicions entirely, not that she'd ever imagine he was using all of his minutes to speak with his teacher even if she did find out.

But as much as Frank adored Gerard's messages and hearing his voice, the best occasions by far were when Frank was able to spend a few hours with Gerard in his place which was quickly becoming a second home to Frank, and even if he had to wait until his mother was asleep so he could sneak off, and although he was always exhausted and half dead on his feet the next day, it was always worth it when he got to feel Gerard's lips on his, when Gerard would hold him close and murmur how much he missed him.